Hi all. I have not been on here in a while because things with my sd, dd, hubby, and I have all really been doing great! My issue today is not really a stepfamily issue but I thought you gals would be able to give me some good advice.
So the short story is that my 19 yr old sister just moved in with us in Sept. with her 1yr old son. Her bf was a total loser and when he finally did something so over the top I got her to leave him by offering her and her son a room in my home for low rent and told her I would help babysit her son. (I lost my job over the summer as a result of my company going under).
Anyways she has been living here and paying her low rent. I had told her she would be expected to help clean around here and she has not been doing much, but she is also not home much. She leaves at like 6am and gets home from work and school around 6pm.
This schedule has taken a toll on me. I end up getting up earlier than I had to with my girls each day because my nephew wakes up by 6:30. I have him all day long. My girls get home and I have to help them with homework and make dinner while taking care of my nephew.
I know some people think this is not so bad. But its not for me! Me and dh didn't want any more children for this reason. I mentioned to my sister about having her best friend who is a stay home mom babysit sometimes and she said "are you going to drive my son there in the morning?" I said "no he is not my responsibility!".
My house is always a disaster because I can not get much done with my nephew home all day. And when he naps I nap because I am so tired! When my sister is home she does not seem to do much with her son. She frequently goes outside to smoke or to her room to talk on the phone and just expects (without asking) for me and hubby and girls to keep an eye on my nephew. The only time she really seems to spend with him is diaper changing, playing for a few minutes, and then laying down watching a movie with him at night. On the weekends it is different though and she really is good with him. I know her schedule is tough, and I remember how hard being a young single mom is so I don't want to be too hard on her.
I got myself into this overwhelming situation. I would like to watch my nephew say 3 days during the week instead of five. When I try to approach this with my sister she gets angry. I don't know what to do. I did say I would help her with babysitting but I guess I did not know what I was getting myself into. My sister makes too much $ at work to get any kind of state assistance for childcare so any childcare expenses would come out of her pocket. And her ex is a loser with no job so she won't get any help out of him.
Any ideas on how to approach this?