Getting Adult Step Children to Move OUT
My husband and I have his 21 year old daughter living with us along with her 27 year old loser BF. They moved in around March of 07 and we now found out she is pregnant. They were suppose to just be staying here for a "few months" but now it has been 9 already. My husband said they if she did end up getting pregnant (which we feared)that we would make them move out. Well, now that it has happended my husband and has now informed me he can't give them a time limit and we will see how it goes. This is so ridulous! His daughter has always been disrespectful of him. She talks down to him, has a snotty tone when she speaks to us, lazy and doesn't even work full time. The BF works some side jobs here and there but that's about it. He has been in and out of jail since he was a young teenager and does not have a drivers lisence since he lost it with his many fines. A few of thoese fines are DWI. He also had a "domestic abuse" fine a few years ago. They pay a small amount for rent to us for staying here. Of course, however, every time it is due they have an excuse to not pay it on time. We hear "Well, BF's boss is not answering his phone and so we can't get his check" "Oh, we had this other thing to pay for". They had moved into our home because they could not longer afford to pay rent at the apartment they were staying at. It's funny how this daughter needs to stay with us now when about 4 1/2 years ago we asked her to spend half of her overnights at our house when she was 17 because her mother was going to take my husband to court to seek child support. Up until that point, she had been staying with us half the time but the Mom is good at manipulating her kids and she convinced this daughter that she should just live with her. My husband had sat down with his daughter at that time and told her "Listen, I know you don't like that I got married again and all but you only have to spend half of your overnights here for the next 8 months like you have been doing. If you don't, your Mom is going to take me to court and charge me for child support which you know I can't afford. I want you to remember that Your Mom is the one who divorced me. I never wanted any of this" His daughter didn't care that it was going to cost him 10,000. So, he ended up taking out a loan to pay this lump sum to his ex for child support. It was so ridulous because his daughter was almost 18 and she could have just saved her Dad the money but she chose to stick it to him just like his ex always trys to do. His other daughter at that time was 22 and she wrecked her car. We then find out she had NO insurance on the car. It was declared totaled. Guess who had co-signed for he loan the year before? You guessed it-my husband. So, now he had to go to the bank and pay off the loan. It was just a little over 10,000. Two bills in that amount within 3 months of each other. Neither one of these girls, his daughters, cared that they had caused this financial burden on him. After the fact they acted like "Hey, what's the big deal?" That is always their attitude. Now the current problem with the 21 year old living with us. They are lazy, sloppy and obviously using us. The little bit they pay us to stay here doesn't even cover the cost of gas, water and electric. They don't have cell phones so they get and make all their calls from our home phone. Sometimes that phone is ringing 20 times a day for them and it's driving me nuts. They stay in our basement, which-by the way-is all brand new because my husband and I made a few bedrooms down there and a living, kitchen bathroom and game room. We did ALL the labor our selves. We didn't even get a chance to entertain our friends down there like we had planned because all of a sudden his daughter and BF needed a place to stay. The BF smokes too and we don't allow that in our house so he is constantly in and out the front door to smoke. Now with the whole baby thing......I just don't see any end to this. How the heck do I get them out of here? I can't even say squat to them about anything otherwise they run to my husband and say I am being pushy about this or that. The only thing I have said to them is: "stop leaving the front door unlocked, clean out the frig down there-it's filthy, please get your clothes out of the washer and dryer because other people have to use it, please clean the bathroom down there because its disgusting"
These are not unreasonable things to ask. Do they do them? No, heck no. They try to pretent I don't matter. The 21 year old trys to cause problems with my spouse and I as well. I am just to sick of this. I don't want my marriage to end because of these rude, careless people. What do I do?