27 SS rtt

kennysmimaNovember 2, 2011

Forgive me if I am long winded. I don't know where to start and if anyone has any questions please feel free to ask. I have been looking for a forum like this to help me deal with my 27yr.old SS he has 2 children, with two different women, lives in his own place, with his BM who is employed, he is employed yet he still feels entitled to his $100 wk allowance. I have been with his father for 10 yrs. married for 3 of those, living together for nine of the 10 yrs. I have helped him and was there when his mother abandoned him. This all changed after his mother's return. In the past I have been used for money and recently as a free babysitter for his infant son. I arrived at his apt at 6:30AM and go

home at 6:00PM pay $15 dollars in tolls daily, buy food for

lunch because there was not much "proper" food except baby food. Called at least 5 times daily conversations lasting a minimum 20 minutes. After all this because you needed help. I was treated rude and with disrespect. Evrery bottle was used and needed to be washed

before I could make them there were dishes to be

washed it was as if I was a servant. He has now said

that he cannot accept me in his life. His

father has continued to give him this "allowance". What I say is that at 27 living on your own, making babies you should not be

receiving this financial assistance especially when SS refuses to act appropriate with polite civility. For any additional background information required to assist in advising me please ask. All replies and opinions are welcomed. Thanks this is my first post and as I said before I am new on this site. This whole situation is very stressful.

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If he was 17 when you met his father, how does a mother abandon a 17 year old? He was practically an adult. Now he is back with his BM? If he lives in his own place with his BM, why are you going over to babysit? Tell him you are busy if you don't want to babysit or if you don't think he is paying you properly. Nobody is forcing you to babysit, I assume? If he doesn't respect or appreciate you, why do him ANY favors?

If there are safety/health concerns, such as no clean dishes/bottles for the baby, then talk to your DH about involving family to help or perhaps social services needs to have a talk with him.

If a 27 year old does not know how to treat someone properly, he should not expect things from you such as babysitting. As for his "allowance", that is between him & his dad. It may be a problem for YOU, but that is your problem with your husband, not your stepson.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2011 at 9:26PM
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Thanks for the reply the mother was caught cheating and moved out. emptied the bank accounts with no warning no explaination when SS was 15 and did not keep in contact with SS. I thought that was abandoning a minor. Maybe my issue thanks. Let's keep this going I needed this. Thanks for the husband answer you got it.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2011 at 10:05PM
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I agree with Ima - it is not your responsibility to babysit or help him out. It is not your DH's responsibility, for that matter. He's 27 years old, he's got two kids - he's an adult. When one is an adult one has to accept that actions have consequences. Being rude and disrespectful towards someone who is doing you a favor tends to have the immediate consequence of - no more favors.

    Bookmark   November 3, 2011 at 8:54AM
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