A little less DRAMA please!!!!
This isn't so SF related... and I don't know if anyone's advice will help, but I'm having a bad day and it helps to vent... so here goes.
My son is deploying. He's being sent to Afghanistan in two weeks. Today is the last day of his leave... he's been staying with me for a week. With all the talk of October being the deadliest month in Afghanistan, I'm having an even harder time with this than I thought I would. All of the drama of the past week has only made it worse.
My DS spent the first five days of leave, driving a moving truck with his wife and son. His wife is 19, bi polar and not medicated. It takes all my patience to tolerate her for very long, except when she's on her best behavior... which is rare. But, I smile and say nothing to make the situation worse. I wanted a nice visit with my son and couldn't wait to see my grandson.
So, they arrived last Tuesday and right away... I noticed little things. She told him to do this or that for the baby, after all, he is only going to be here another week to help HER out! I have not seen her so much as change a diaper or make a bottle. He does everything and she bosses him. Well, I said nothing... he's a grown, married man. Right? If he wants to be hen pecked, that's not my business.
Well, on Halloween they decided to take the baby trick or treating. They dressed him up and borrowed my daughter's camera to take cute pictures. The camera needed batteries so they stopped at a store & he went in, she stayed in the car with the baby. When he came out, as they were driving, she accused him of flirting with the cashier. She started hitting him and he finally pulled over and got out as she smacked him hard on his ear. He started to walk away and she told him if he doesn't get back in the car, she's going to divorce him. He kept walking & called me to come pick him up. She then tried to chase him with her car & he says he had to jump to avoid being hit. A passerby stopped & gave him a ride to a store where I picked him up. He did not want to call police because he says he didn't want her to get in trouble, just for her to stop acting like that.
After I picked him up, we drove back to my house and she had already gotten there & put the baby in my daughter's room and was in her car leaving. She sent my son a text to tell him where the baby is and she didn't tell anyone in the house she was leaving the baby, nobody knew the baby was in there. So, we came in to get the baby & a few minutes later she came in the house, demanding to take the baby with her. He said no way... lots of arguing and us telling her she needs to leave our house, we don't need this drama or scene with SD trying to go to sleep. She sat on our porch, and came back banging on the door, threatening to kill herself so I called the cops to make her leave. When they got there, she was gone but they found her (to check on her because of the threats) and after my son gave his statement, she was arrested for domestic violence. She spent the night in jail and bailed out the next day. The baby is now with my son and she is staying with her parents. They don't really want her there, they have kicked her out in the past and don't get along for very long... so I don't think they are gung ho about having the baby there with her. Her stepdad is a real jerk. They lived with me in the month the baby was born because her mom & stepdad wouldn't let her stay there. Then my son moved her out of state to the base. (My son says it's because they don't like him because he's hispanic)
I guess my son has been dealing with this for a while. She is abusive and was arrested for hitting him on the base where they were living. She had to move back here because she was banned from being on any base in that state. She was arrested twice in the last 7 months for domestic violence and he tells me that she would hit him as he was driving the moving truck. He says he wants to divorce her but has stayed because of the baby.. Now, he's leaving in the morning to report for duty and will be deployed in two weeks for a year and is putting off the divorce until he gets back (he's giving me power of attorney, so I could possibly file on his behalf if he asks me to). We are trying to figure out what is going to happen with the baby since their marriage can be figured out later... he's gonna be gone so she can't hit him. Now, I'm terrified of her turning on this baby because she is not rational. I've told her if she takes the baby, CPS will be involved & I'm trying to get her to leave the baby with me while she gets a place to live and anger management, although I think she needs more than that. I know about domestic violence but I don't know much about bi polar and who knows what other mental health issues she has???
This makes dealing with SD's BM, a walk in the park!