get involved? If so, how much?
Since SD's final 'revelation" about her mom and her refusal to continue with the every other Thursday PM to Monday AM visitation schedule (beginning of September) SD has seen her mom a handful of times. SD, mom and dad (DH) went to SD's counselor together a month ago and he suggested every Sunday visits for the month to ease back into regular visitation. They had all but one (mom had a girls weekend trip) and SD didn't enjoy any of them. It was a bit of a pain to have every Sunday visits as it kept our family from doing much, but we saw the importance in this and made adjustments.
So, today they go back to the counselor to discuss how the month went. SD originally thought she would be okay with every other Saturday afternoon to Sunday evening after the day visits, but after yesterday's visit said she just wants every other Sunday, period.
I totally understand why SD doesn't want to go to her moms, but as a mom I know that 6 hours e.o. week isn't enough time. DH and I discussed suggesting mom pick SD up from school on her weekday off and keep her through dinner on the alternating weeks, but we don't know if it's our 'place' to do so. SD has really taken the bull by the horns with regard to her mom - once the camel's back broke she's had little problem telling her mom just how she feels about her, her new bf, etc. She is almost 15 and has shown us how strongly she feels about this. . . at this time. Should we just let SD and her mom 'battle' it out (with the counselor's help) or should we try to sway SD into seeing her mom more? Because she is almost 15 I know next month she could hate us and want to live with her mom so anything we do is temporary, but my guilt as a mom is fighting against my satisfaction as a stepmom over this.
What do you ladies think?