Help / 16 yr old SD
My husband and I have been married for almost a year, we have been together for almost six years. I'm struggling with my SD, she is 16 and has now been living with us for 3 mnths. She never before has lived with her father and actually had very little to do with him (except for $$,sad but true) and now has came to live with us basically if the truth be known because she wasn't getting her way at her mother's. Granted 2 days before she moved in she had told her dad that she would cut him out of her life, as well as making sure her brother do the same, because financially we were going to have to cut one of their cell phone lines, which we didn't even have to provide (she never would cut him out because he's the one she always comes to for whatever she feels she wants). I now feel truly uncomfortable in our home, there is a stress within me that I have never had before. Since I have been with my husband she and her brother have always been an issue (her brother is still living with their mother) as well as their mother (my husband and she were never married).They have always treated me poorly and don't even say hello without being told to tell me hello. They never treated their father much better. There have been court battles, lies, and hurt, with no remorse whatsoever from the children. They even accused my husband of physically abusing them while they were in his care and had a restraining order placed on him, which was removed and following a court hearing with witnesses that were there during the so called abuse was dismissed after the judge thought it was basically conjured up lies between the mother and the children. I can't go into all the background it would be novel size. My issue is now with her being here I am truly uncomfortable, my husband is now of course over compensating (which he always has)and she is taking advantage of her father as usual. I don't know if I'll ever trust her for she has never given me reason to do otherwise. She now has her way of course, she basically runs her own show and now is trying to take over our "show". My husband is a wonderful man, but he had told me not long into our relationship his children were always first. Maybe I should have taken him at his word, even though in our wedding vows we stated that each of us were now and always would be first. I worry about my husband's welfare as well as our marriage, it already is taking it's toll on our marriage. I can't help remember my husband's attorney stating to me after the court hearing on the restraining order and allegations of abuse that I nor my children should ever be alone with my husband's children without witnesses present and sadly that their father shouldn't be either. It was apparent the trouble that they could cause. Sorry to ramble, but it's so hard. I just don't know what to do... I need advice. Any advice would be appreciated I feel I'm fighting a losing battle.