Scheduling issue, WWYD?
BM called DH the other day and asked if he could check the calendar and see if we had plans on the 3rd. (It's a Thurs. and it's one of DH's regular days.) It's SS's little sister's bday and BM is having a party.
Ok---in MY mind, asking him to "check the calendar" implies that she is willing to accept the fact that we might have plans and not be able to switch.
As luck would have it, we DO have plans. We have tickets with my dad to a charity holiday night at the zoo. The zoo is decorated w/lights, and we can take the train around and see the lights; Santa will be there for the kids, there's face painting, dinner, etc.
So DH told BM that we did have plans and, of course, she flipped out.
Now I can see both sides here. It IS his little sister's birthday, and I honestly think SS would like to be there. BUT I also know both our kids are excited about this night at the zoo, and I know SS will be sad to miss that.
Am I crazy for thinking BM should plan the bday celebration around her schedule w/SS if she wants him to be there? Dh pointed this out to her, and she said no, she won't do that b/c she ALWAYS celebrates the day of the actual bday.
So--now DH and I both feel like, given the fact that BM pitched a big fit, he really CANNOT give in. But then it's going to be this big issue with SS, I am sure, because BM will go on about how terrible DH is, etc.
Should we give SS the choice? At 7 yrs old, I hate to give him that kind of decision-making power.
The frustrating thing is---DH and I both committed ourselves to REALLY sticking with the schedule and NOT asking BM for favors/switching, etc. It just gets ugly b/c it sets a precedent and leads to expectations. DH and I have committed ourselves to finding a babysitter if something comes up on a night we have SS---and trying as best we can to plan anything we do around when we do/don't have SS.
UGHHHHH. I guess the "mom" part of me feels bad, though, because I DO understand why BM wants SS to be at his little sister's party.