How is your relationship with your in-laws?
I was thinking this weekend about how different my relationship is with my new in-laws, compared to how it was with my EX's family. I still have a very good relationship with my ex Mother-in-law. She always treated me like one of her own children and she understood the difficulties I experienced with her son, and never faulted me for leaving the marriage after 24 years. I love her dearly. And I still have a good relationship with my ex's siblings.
However, the relationship I now have with my husband's family is so different. DH and I have been together for 8 years and his family seemed so happy in the beginning because he had found someone who loved and respected him and was willing to take on the responsiblity of helping him raise his son. DH's mother is a lovely woman, but I always feel that when she comes to visit us (it's usually an extended stay, as she lives in another province), she is there to see her son and grandson and that's it. She also speaks a language that I don't understand and uses it to communicate with them while I'm sitting right there, effectively leaving me out of the conversation. BTW, she does speak English perfectly well.
They had a family party two years ago and DH's sister, mom, and aunts decided to do several collages of family photos, both old and new. Well, guess who didn't appear in any of those collages -- YEP, that's right -- the newby! I didn't let it bother me too much, but DH was livid. He spoke to his sister about it, and they scrambled to print off some facebook photos and stick them to the edge of the collage -- well, it was pretty lame, but I can laugh at it now.
DH's family also never acknowledge me on my birthday, christmas, etc., while I go out of my way to make sure they receive a card and gift for every occasion.
I'm a grown woman, so I don't really lose any sleep over this stuff, but I just find it really bizarre. I don't think DH's ex was liked very much by my in-laws and apparently she wasn't shy about expressing her dislike of them, so perhaps that's why they are a bit stand-offish with me.
I'm wondering how your relationship with your DH's family is and how is compares to how they were with your DH's ex.