Step mother advice (sorry long)
my mom died about 9 years ago. My dad remarried about 6 years ago. At the time my brother was 14. step mother and him have butted heads from the beginning. My dad took her out for their first date after they met on the internet and she move in immediately and i mean she never left. That was in the spring and they married in feb. Things were difficult for my little brother, however, me and my adult brother were okay with it and even happy for my dad. My brother 23 still lives at home and they do not get along. i have often invited her to hang out with the girls go to movies, scrapbook, events for the grandkids. She has only taken me up on it once or twice. She is constantly yelling about things, during a fight with my bro she called my dad and lied to him (i later explained what actually happened), she belittles my youngest brother, she is short and inmpatient lately with the grandchildren (even my dad has noticed this), whenever my dad comes over or calls she will repeatedly call him over and over again within the first few minutes (he does not come over or call like he used to), she did not come over for a b-day party and called dad quite a few times and accidently left a message on home phone of her crying and saying she can not beleive he would come over when she has such a bad headache. Lastly, me and my sister-inlaw had scrapbooked at dad's house with my youngest bro girlfriend. Sister-inlaw left some things behind. Stepmom is over heard saying she is going to burn it because they would have taken it if they wanted it and my dad was telling her not too. My bro went to retrieve the stuff but now it can not be found. I am just lost as to what to do i was very open to the one big family idea. have tried to include her and even her children. We usually take turns with thanksgiving, i called her it was suppost to be my turn this years but she said she is doing it. i said fine then she tells me that she has already talked to her family. She knew it was my year but went ahead and made plans irregardless of how i felt. Any advise would be great!