Had the most wonderful talk with SD33 last night.
I feel so blessed to have this woman in my life....I hope that those of you that are custodial step parents will be encouraged by the relationship that I enjoy with my SD33. I could not ask for any thing more.
She was married in Hawaii about a week ago. She is now a step mom herself. She has no bio kids yet. I now have a new SIL and a new grandson who is 4 1/2.( for reasons that I don't understand my new grandson does not have grandparents that want to be involved in his life....I am thrilled to have him in mine and had such fun Christmas shopping for him! ).....They live in AR....we live in Nebraska.
My SD called last night and we spent nearly 2 hours on the phone. We covered every subject it seems...she was really concerned about my DD20 and the problems that have happened lately with the ex bf. The entire story is on the parents forum if you care to read about it. SD also talked about many memories she had of she and I when she was young and things that we did together. I am so touched that her memories are so sweet....I had such a hard time in the marriage to her dad and struggled a lot with being a SM.
She watched her half brother and sister for me for a while after the divorce and the memories that she has from that experience are wonderful for her. We laughed as we walked down memory lane. What a blessing this relationship is to me.
I guess what I am trying to say...and not doing a very good job of it....is that as you go through the young years with these kids, struggle with issues that are unique to being a step parent....just do the right thing by these children and I believe that they will remember that and love and respect you for it. I remember thinking when SD was young that I may not see the rewards of my labors until she was in her 20's. It just happened to play out that way and I am so grateful. I do not think that any time you spend taking care of a child is done in vane. Your influence will remain with them all of their lives and when they are grown and remember their childhood I hope that they remember you as lovingly and as sweetly as my SD33 remembers me. She could have chosen to dwell on my mistakes but instead has chosen to see things in a most positive way. She has grown into a wonderful woman, a loving wife and step mom that is determined to make life as good for her stepson as she can. I am so proud of her.