Friendliness Level of Bioparents
Not to change the topic from dance dresses (ha, sorry) but I have a question I thought I would bring up, since it is something I have been thinking about this week. I am a BM and SM both, and my children have an SM. All the children are in college now. All through their high school years my husband and I have bitten the bullet and spent a fair amount of time with our respective ex-spouses and their new spouses (and even their spouses' kids too...it gets complicated!) at kids' events. Things have been friendly enough and it has been good for all the children to see everyone getting along.
All along there has been something of a disparity in the amount of contact we have with our exes. My ex and I are friendly and businesslike, speak infrequently, have done almost everything separately with our children (with the exception of things that must be done in tandem, e.g., school functions, sports).
My husband's ex-wife has usually made the maximum effort to have things be the four of them--her, the children, my DH. But, she will have me there if I must be. Her husband hardly ever attends things. My husband usually tries (mostly successfully) to wriggle out of "nuclear family" events that don't include me. He doesn't enjoy spending time with his ex.
Sorry for going on and on. I was just wondering if those of you with grown stepchildren find that BM expects this level of contact to continue? (Or if you are a BM, do you want it?) I sure don't with my ex! I had expected her to scroll back some now that the kids are relatively independent, but no.
What do I have to look forward to?