DH's Heartache Last Night
As you know, SD rarely returns text messages, voicemails or e-mails. Rarer still is the unsolicited text message, voicemail or e-mail from her to any one of us. So you can imagine DH's thrill when he received a text from SD last night without having sent one to her first.
It read (and I will substitute the name with "Smith" just for anonymityÃ¢ÂÂs sake) "Hey dad are you getting a Smith shirt at walmart????" DH asks me "What is a Smith shirt?" I said I didn't know and proceeded to do what all intelligent people do when they don't know what something is...Google it. What came up as the first three suggestions? A high school where SD lives is called Smith High School. So then I Googled "Smith shirt walmart" and came up with the same results. I told DH that I wasn't sure so he texted her back "what's a Smith shirt, sweetheart?" She texted back "LOL what about Smith?" So he forwarded her her original text back and she never responded.
The only thing we can figure out is that she meant to send the text to her SF...her dad.
Poor DH! I could see his face just fall and I FRIGGIN HATE THAT! I HATE to see the hurt all over his face!
I didnÃ¢ÂÂt do it, but I wanted to send her a text saying "way to go...as if you don't stab him in the heart all the time now you're twisting the knife...do you ever stop hurting your dad?" I repeat...I didn't send it, but I wish someone would tell her how much she is hurting him.
But it will never be me. After the blow-up with BM over the CS review, I'm reluctant to communicate AT ALL with SD. BM accused me of manipulating SD into coming here. Oh like that is such a bad thing even if I was. BUT I'M NOT! First of all, I'm hardly as manipulative as BM. The only thing she could possibly be talking about was Christmas Eve when (after she told me she didn't know when she was coming and didn't answer my text about going to the amusement park while she was here) I asked why she doesn't want to come visit her dad.
So asking questions is manipulative???? DH told her that I was trying to do something that would benefit SD whereas BM's manipulations only harm her. Good for DH for standing up to her, but I still can't win. If I didn't talk to SD ever (i.e. "she doesn't feel connected to your family") I would be accused of hating her. But because I love her and want her to visit, I'm manipulative. UGH!!!!!!!!
As I said in another thread, I wish I had the stones that BM has to lie and hurt good people and still sleep at night. Why does it seem like DH and I are the only ones who see how wrong this is??? SF and BM's family all-but encourage it! Are they brainwashed, too?