A new issue..advice please

sweethrttttSeptember 2, 2009

My boyfriend has said that he would like us to get out pictures taken for Christmas this year..which I think is a great idea...my question is this..he has made no reference to his daughter...she lives in California and has still yet to come to see us at our home..she can never make it...anyways...do I include her in the pictures?? My heart is not in it..but I feel it is the right thing to do...I also feel like what the heck is wrong with me..that is his daughter and my heart should be in it..shouldnt it?? So do we do pics with my girls, myself and BF..do I wait for him to bring up his daughter..or do I bring up the subject of having his daughter take portraits with us...or leave it as just us without her??? And please..someone tell me how to feel better about this whole boyfriends daughter situation..I want to accept her, I want to have open arms and an open heart...I WANT to...but I just havent been able to...any suggestions please??

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justmetoo

Why borrow trouble where none may exist? What did husband say when he brought up the idea? If he did not give any details on what he had in mind, ask him.

Bring it up again, on how you think photos are a wonderful idea and what he has in mind. If he says "well all of us" (you two and all the kids), great, have everybody. Tell him he can invite the daughter and let you know when the time is coming up for her to show up so you can make an appointment.

When it comes to the actual photos, if his daughter does not come I'd do your girls together, your BF and you together, and one of all of you. If the daughter does come and actually show up for appointment, then you could do group shots also: your girls, his daughter, you and your girls, him and his daughter, everybody, ect.

That way you have photos to show with what family members of all the children you'd like to share, and additional ones for yourself and BF to display however you both please in your household.

Don't sweat the little stuff. His idea, let him tell you what he has in mind and chip in your own suggestions.

    Bookmark   September 2, 2009 at 4:00PM
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finedreams

I don't see any issues, ask him when SD is planning on being here so you can make an appointment with all the kids. you can't just sit and wait and wonder, you have to ask.

    Bookmark   September 2, 2009 at 4:08PM
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kkny

Is there something in the male genes that they cant undertand details?

Its great you are thinking ahead.

My daughter is at school, and she told me to email picture of me, however I want, outside house, etc, to her, and she will "photoshop" it and add her to picture. I told her also please take at least 10 pounds off me. hahaha

    Bookmark   September 3, 2009 at 12:17PM
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