BM reported to DSS
So in my previous post I mentioned how my BF's BM and BM's mom bicker back and forth.
Well, this past weekend they got into a fight via texts and it ended with the grandma reporting BM to DSS. Grandma told DSS that BM sleeps around with a lot of guys, does drugs, and talks mean to her son.
So last night BF tells me he talked to BM and she told him she got a card on her door from DSS and they want to meet with her, BF, and their son this Wednesday.
I don't know what's going to happen. Does anyone know what happens when someone is reported to DSS and how serious does the abuse have to be before they'll take a child away?
I don't know how to feel about this. I don't want the kid to be verbally abused, but I don't think that's the case here. I think grandma is making mountains out of molehills.
The other thing is the drug situation. My BF occasionally smokes weed. Grandma told DSS that BM does drugs, so I'm guessing they'll do a drug test on her. So if she comes up positive for drugs, will they go on to test BF? If he comes up positive for drugs, then what?
BF is panicking that if BM tests positive for drugs and he does as well, they're going to put his son in a foster home. I told BF that I think they would send his son to his grandma before they send him to a foster home. My BF snapped, We can't assume that! I've assumed things before about custody before and it didn't happen the way you think it should so we can't assume anything!
I said I wasn't assuming anything, but seems common sense the state would rather the kid go to next of kin instead of paying for foster care. But he didn't want to hear that.
I told him he gets so touchy whenever we get on the subject of custody. I asked him what happened to him in the past to make him get so upset over the subject of custody. He got even more touchy, said he couldn't remember exactly what happened but he knows that when he was in court with BM over custody that he would think things would be a certain way and come to find out that wasn�t the way it happened.
I don't understand what traumatic event happened in the custody case that gets him so upset when this subject is talked about. Custody and talking about his son's behavior are the only things he gets touchy about and I don't understand why it sets him off.
I find it fishy that he can't "remember" what happened in his own son's custody case. To get so upset over it but can't remember what happened makes me wonder if he's not telling me the whole truth about his custody case.
I was searching online court records and I found his court case. It was filed in 2006, but it kept getting rescheduled until finally they went to court in Nov 2010. He told me that he started the case, but he's listed as the defendant, so doesn't that mean BM took him to court? Should I try and get the court records? If he's hiding something from me I want to find out now before I move in with him.