I forgot to point out that the young nephew who passed at 20 is of course, my skids 1st cousin, and his father, DH's brother, is their uncle.
how sad and awful for a young man's parents, of course DH had to be there to support everyone
Again, LA, I am so sorry. This tears at my heartstrings. So young. Of course your DH had to be there for his brother. I cannot imagine how devastated they must feel.
There have been several young people (16-25) who have died in my extended family/friends lately. The pain is nearly unspeakable. I was not particularly close to any of these people but am haunted frequently by the "what-ifs" and the knowledge that their close loved ones have an immense hole that will never be filled. Listening to a mother comment on FB that her daughter will never get married, no grandkids, no wedding, no senior prom, no college... so many dreams gone.
How callous of your Skids not to acknowledge the pain of their father and that when someone dies unexpectedly and tragically often people do not think straight and are not capable of rationalizing their time (ie, being able to consider the feelings of an ex-spouses family).