11yo and respecting the home
So, 11yo SS is quite destructive. He has ADHD and is less cautious than other kids - we get that. But now that he's nearly the size of a small adult, he can do a whole lot of damage.
Some of his damage is accidental because he's a kid and a human. That's fine.
Some of his damage is accidental because he simply doesn't pay attention. This isn't precisely desirable, and we'd like to change it, but we understand it.
Some of his damage is not accidental. This is not OK. (eg - I am trying to fix the closet doors after repainting the room. They are broken because he pitched a big fit and slammed the door, breaking the slider and the spring fittings).
The bigger problem though is that he absolutely doesn't care when he breaks or damages something. His responses are to 1) shrug and say something along the lines of "So what?" or "I don't care," 2) shrug and say "Well we have more of them" or "Buy a new one" or "Ceph/Dad can fix it," or 3) cry and call us mean for asking him to help with the cleanup or to do it himself
I can handle that he's more accidentally destructive than some other kids. But the attitude is really p1ssing me off, and the breaking/damaging during hissy fits needs to stop.
Any thoughts on how we get him to better respect the home and the things in it?
If it affects your advice:
He's currently not taking very good care of himself or his own personal possessions either... For examples: He had a nosebleed the other day and was mad that we told him he had to go into the bathroom to tend to it instead of letting blood run all over his face and clothes. DH collects sports memorabilia and SS asked for some of the hockey cards; DH gave some to him and gave him sleeves to put them in, but SS shoved some of them into the back of a desk drawer and kicked the rest under his bed.
He was pretty much destructoboy when he was about 8, but then was MUCH better and did almost no damage for awhile. But in the past 6 months, it's out of hand and there's a lot of attitude about it. So it needs to be dealt with somehow.
You ladies have the best advice for EOW parenting of kids with behavioral troubles :)