Dh and I had a huge argument yesterday. I was already mad, because dh let sd go to her friends Friday and Saturday (all day until 10pm), even though she was completely not deserving of it due to behaviors the days before.
Plus she not only sprung the date on her dad (she told him thursday night), she insisted to him that she had previously discussed her going for the entire weekend through Sunday. She never did. Because her and her dad had a discussion about how she should not just ask for an entire weekend off from work when that is where she gets the lions share of her hours, and she is one of the only ones trained to open (per her own words).
Well it turned into discussion about how she only asked for one day off that was saturday, and they just gave her friday off, and she wouldn't know about sunday until she called. Ok, well that still means you can't stay until sunday then, because you don't even know if you will work your usual hours, which is 7am to 3pm. Fine, she agreed to just go overnight on friday and come home saturday. But she was totally pissed off and would not do anything, and just moped around all day friday doing nothing. then she wanted me to take her to the shoe store! LOL!
Well come saturday after 10pm, she needed to "call" and find out if she worked sunday morning. BTW...when we picked her up she was burnt to a crisp....all day in the sun with no sunblock. Smart....anyway, we get home and she goes downstairs to put her stuff away and her dad is outside turning the sprinklers off etc. I was in the living room watching the end of 12 monkeys. She comes up and comes to in to the living room and tells me that she has sunday off and doesn't work until monday....I was like, well when did you call them? She said, i just did. Uhhhh....she did not pick up the phone and dial anyone...I was right there, and you can hear our phone from anywhere upstairs, because the button tones are so freakin' loud. I called her on it, and she got sooo pissed! She just storms outside to tell her dad her "schedule". I told him she wasn't on the phone, and she just gets pissy and storms off downstairs.
So, arguement with dh, was after I went to the mall sunday afternoon with my mom, and two of my kids. Left the baby with him. I was mad when I came home because none of them helped pick anything up around the house, etc. Baby was even sleeping. But yes I was still mad because dh didn't believe, me when I told him that his dd did not call her work. She knew she had the time off a long time ago, because she had the whole weekend planned already. He won't see it. So I was the one who was lying?
So all of the sudden, it turns into this huge blowup about how his dd does everything, and she works full time (no she doesn't). I have told all of you her one and only chore is to do the dishes. Then he starts attacking my son (which is his ss) saying he doesn't do "sh*t". Oh ok, that is why he just mowed the lawn the other day (and every week), takes out the trash everyday, sometimes twice a day, and takes care of all the cats.
It just turned into a him against her thing, and it was so stupid and ridiculous. Nothing got resolved in my opinion. I was just pissed, and now I just want to leave. He accused me of wanting to "just get rid of his kids"....yes, that is right, that is why they both came to live with us and I have tried to teach both of them things and be nothing but good to them...all because I want you to leave them behind @@. Men are so stupid!!
the funny thing is...he is the one that has done nothing with my son,( his ss). He has never played ball with him, or taken him fishing or played games with him...nothing. I never asked him to, I never expected him to. But if you are going to accuse me of ridiculous things...then you better be flawless yourself. I just told him, fine...I will treat sd just like you treat my son, and that will be the end of it.
Sd kept trying to be up in our argument the whole time, looking all wounded. I finally got pissed and just yelled at her to go to her room. I couldn't take it. she just revels in this crap and loves pitting her dad and I against one another. Her dad became blind to it somewhere along the way, and he used to be good at seeing that kind of thing.
Gawd, it just pisses me off that as a step mom you are expected to do and be all. But I have done what I could for them.
I have tried to teach sd things that her mom should have taught her, and things that she can't teach her now since she isn't around....and this is how I get treated.
Omg, DH even had the balls to say that my son whacking his sister on the head when she was being annoying is the same type of abuse that sd inflicts on the baby and to her little sister. Yes, my son didn't need to hit at all, and he was ripped a new one by me for it...believe me, he was tore into. I won't tolerate it, because my older brother used to be so mean to me when we were kids, and i won't stand for my own son to treat his little sister that way. It never happened again. But to say that it was the same as sd slapping the baby in the face?! Oh, and not sure if I mentioned...she stopped slapping...only thing is, she resorted to pulling his hair, and pinching him now. but that is all okay apparently. She did all that to her little sister too, and only stopped when dd started telling us what was going on. Now she just says mean things to her but won't touch her.
*sigh* sorry this is so long...I so needed to vent this off. I am still not a happy camper. We still need to sit and have a discussion, maybe when both of us are not so angry. But I can't take her manipulating and this pitting her dad and I against each other. No one sees how she is when no one is around. They aren't around her as often as I am. I see things that others don't, because she behaves like a totally different person when others are around. It is like jekyl and hyde.