Laundry anyone?

parent_of_oneJuly 28, 2011

In a long scheme of things it might not be important yet it is something I want to fix.

YSD uses our hamper in a master bathroom. Now I'd rather she not, there are very specific reasons for it. If anyone wants to know, I'll tell.

OSD never uses our hamper and in fact I never saw any of her laundry, YSD is a different story.

I don't feel like telling her directly, somehow it might sound offensive, there are already too many changes and rules that are different from what they get used to, i don't feel like directly pushing yet another one...

Anyways I have laundry baskets and placed one in a guest bedroom in the past, she only used it to carry clean laundry back to her room but not for dirty laundry. So it hasn't been working.

Now for this visit I bought a collapsible hamper and am going to place in a guest room, possibly saying nothing or making a general comment to her that i bought her a hamper. But every time I buy her like body products or whatever else she makes a joke that i do it so she won't take mine. Sure that's one of the reasons. LOL So she might either ignore it like she ignored basket or think i am pushing her out of the master bathroom.

Anyways those of you with adult kids, do they use your hamper, do they have their own baskets/hampers? Generally how do you address it and how do you think i should address it.

Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
silversword

Put your hamper in your closet when she visits. Put the "guest hamper" in your master bathroom. Problem solved.

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 3:02PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
parent_of_one

oh, ...I never thought about that! But you know our hamper is a decorative type matching the whole decor of the bathroom, I am very particular about decor. I am not going to take it out of the bathroom. The one I bought is simple collapsible kind, it is not ugly but not decorative kind. Plus SO will complain why is our nice hamper taken out, he won't get it.

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 3:12PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
sylviatexas1

put the plain hamper in your closet & use it when YSD is there?

I do think you're wise not to make an issue of it.

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 3:20PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
ashley1979

She is doing it so you will wash her clothes. What do you do with her clothes?

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 3:50PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
silversword

Exactly Sylvia. Put the plain one in your closet and use it instead.

How old is she again?

"...here are already too many changes and rules that are different from what they get used to..."

With guests and family you have two choices:

1. Let them know what's expected
2. Let them do as they like and work around it

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 5:02PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
parent_of_one

"She is doing it so you will wash her clothes. What do you do with her clothes?"

LOL, no I don't think that's her reasoning, she does not think much about stuff. Yes I often end up washing it because she puts wet stuff in there and it just cannot stay there and get moldy...Plus she uses 2 towels a day and we don't have that many towels. But she often washes everything in a hamper as well, which sounds nice right? But that is my primary issue. Every time that happens she ruins something of mine and SO's. Like puts black blouse with white towels and dries on high. LOL I cannot stand people touching my laundry, I don't mind washing theirs. In the past I placed my dirty clothes in my closet so she cannot get to it, still her stuff mixes up with SO's.

She is in her 20s. Exactly silvers what I've been doing sometimes working aorund it or sometimes telling directly depends on the issue, for example using coasters on my nice furniture she is directly told she MUST do (complies if she remembers), taking or using personal stuff without permission she was told NOT TO (complied), keep the house decent (told by SO)-on the most part complies, somehow I don't want to start with laundry business.

i like everyone's ideas! I think I'll do what people suggested! Keep my dirty laundry in my closet and let her use a nice hamper one in the bathroom. Yeah here would come issue with her putting wet stuff in the hamper and not washing it, it would just stay there....Oh boy

She is a sweet lady, I LOVE when she visits, we get along famously, don't get me wrong, but sure she is airhead (so is my DD). I do want to have balance between accommodating her and having boundaries. I don't want them not wanting to stay at their dads because SM is nagging about everything. ha

thanks everyone

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 5:49PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
silversword

So put a trash bag in there in case it molds...

    Bookmark   July 28, 2011 at 5:55PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
parent_of_one

oh good idea, thanks, it did get mold one year when she was here but we were gone on vacation, it grew mold on a bottom of it due to wet towels there. it has lining but it is fabric one

    Bookmark   July 29, 2011 at 8:52AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
vala55

Put a hamper in the bathroom or laundry room. I have my hampers in my walking closet would not want anyone in there for any reason. It's my space.

    Bookmark   July 31, 2011 at 4:01PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
parent_of_one

hamper is in the bathroom, and she's been using it. it is not the issue though. and my closet is too small for hampers.

    Bookmark   July 31, 2011 at 4:15PM
Sign Up to comment
More Discussions
Trying to figure out how to be a good adult stepdaughter...
My mother died eight years ago, and my dad remarried...
LindaLou22
Marrying Widower with Adult Children
Somebody help me, please! I am about to marry a widower...
sweet3643
7 year old step son troubles please help
Hello everyone, I need some advise please. I have been...
Nikki27
Post Partum Depression Because of Step-Grandmother?
I have a 5 year old boy and a 4 month old girl. I was...
CarolinaMom36
If I could tell mothers of adult stepchildren anything, Part 2
It seems my five-year-old topic has reached its limit...
lilysuzanne40
© 2015 Houzz Inc. Houzz® The new way to design your home™