Just thought I would provide an update for those of you who were so supportive of my freaking out a couple months ago. It is very good news at this point.
BF had his prostate removed last Monday, and at this time everything looks good. He had a couple complications after surgery which were resolved and he is now recovering well. The surgeon thinks he got it all, although he is not declaring BF "cancer-free" until after the first year of monitoring his blood work for signs something is still there. But at this time they think it's gone and there is no recommendation for follow-up radiation or other treatments, which is very good news. I have learned way more about all the various treatments for prostate cancer and what they do to you (prostate removal is bad enough but is not the worst) than anyone really should know... I have long passed the stage where someone should have told me to put down the computer and step away. Although I have at least been smart enough not to discuss what I've learned with him unless he brought it up first :).
He also finally told his kids the week before surgery, which makes me happy. They needed to know (there is a genetic component), and while his ex I'm sure would have pressured him to tell them (so I wouldn't have had to do that), I'm still glad he made that decision on his own.