Filling in response card

mollieannOctober 12, 2004

I know this is going to sound ridiculous, but exactly how do you fill in a rsvp that looks like this...

M________________________. What does the M stand for?

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grace3

I've always thought you "finished" it with

M__r. & Mrs. John Doe

or

M__s. Sally Jones

etc.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2004 at 1:51PM
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mary_md7

I hate that "M" thing. Grace is right that you complete it with the appropriate honorific. But what if the guest is a Dr. or a Fr. or whatever? CH and I used...

Name__________________________

    Bookmark   October 12, 2004 at 2:16PM
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spewey

I toss out the response cards and write a personal note. Response cards are only sent because some people have such bad manners they don't know they are supposed to respond to any invitation, and especially to a wedding invitation. You rarely see them in my part of the country.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2004 at 5:15PM
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gellchom

I also think the "M" is useless at best. You don't use an honorific with your own name, anyway, even if it does start with "M," and as Mary points out, plenty of people's don't.

I always write a personal note on the response card, on the back if that's the only space available, whether or not it has a line or anything else.

When we send out invitations, we don't put any blanks in. It's just a blank card (with a stamped envelope) that says something at the top like,

We look forward to celebrating with you
Please respond by Oct. 1

And then the rest of the space is blank. Not a single person has ever failed to figure out what to do with it -- they all either write a note telling us their plans, or else just write something like "Mary Smith will attend/declines with regret."

We did this even when there were multiple events for out of towners. We included a note with the invitation telling them what was scheduled, and they all figured out to tell us what they would attend without any check boxes or anything on the response cards.

I guess the point is that even if this is the first time you have sent out invitations to anything, it is probably not the first time your guests have received invitations, and many of them have been hosts themselves. So they know what information you need, and they will tell you.

Even without an "M" to start them off.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2004 at 7:17PM
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mollieann

Thank you everyone for answering! I didn't mean to appear stupid, but as I was sitting with pen in hand, It dawned on me that I wasn't exactly sure how to fill it out.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2004 at 7:58PM
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mary_md7

Mollieann, you didn't appear stupid. And in fact, you aren't the first to ask about the "M" and won't be the last.

    Bookmark   October 15, 2004 at 4:19PM
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froggy05

I hate the M thing also. We just picked out the invitations and I substituted Name_____ instead of the M. Tho I really like Gellchom's suggestion of the plain card...

    Bookmark   October 18, 2004 at 1:09AM
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talley_sue_nyc

spewey, you might return the response card WITH your note, if you think there's any chance the bride will be keeping the entire stack in a tidy little packet so she can thumb through them to be sure she's heard from everyone.

one thing "forms" do is give the handlers an efficient way to process them.

    Bookmark   October 18, 2004 at 11:24AM
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mcn128_gmail_com

What do you fill in when the husband is attending and the
wife is not? The invitation is addressed to both.

    Bookmark   April 11, 2011 at 12:42AM
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gellchom

You simply write a note to that effect. I would turn the card over and write:

"Dear Petunia and Cuthbert,
Unfortunately I will be unable to attend, but Thurgood is looking forward to celebrating with you. Congratulations to both of you!
Sincerely,
Lurlene"

    Bookmark   April 11, 2011 at 1:07AM
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suzieque

You fill in "Mr. John Doe ...".

Usually, after that line, there is also a blank space to say the number attending. Put 1 there.

You can also include a note as gellchom said. That's courtesy. (Gellchom - love your choice of names!!!)

    Bookmark   April 11, 2011 at 12:12PM
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rawimmer_qwest_net

I want to fill out a wedding response card but I've never seen this type of card. The first line is a blank line with "Exclamation!" underneath the line. What does this mean and can you give me any suggestions to write in this area?

Thank you,

Ruth Ann

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 11:55AM
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gellchom

Wow. No idea, from what you've said. What else is on the card?

Great example of how being !!!Creative!!! usually just confuses your guests.

But you really don't need to know their intention. You know what they need to know. Are you coming or not? Just turn the card over and write a note telling them as I suggested above. I usually do that even when it's obvious what I'm supposed to write on the front.

I would probably do that, and on the Exclamation! line, I'd write something like "Golly!" or "%$^%@#!!!" or "Hey, nonny, nonny!"

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 1:44PM
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suzieque

I'd be tempted to be contrary and write something like "huh?" or "no idea what you mean" on that line. But I probably wouldn't do it - just be tempted. I agree with gellchom.

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 2:28PM
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scottknapp13_gmail_com

I love the personal note idea, however, if the invitations were sent from the parents of the bride, should I address the note to the bride still or to her parents?

    Bookmark   July 5, 2011 at 9:56PM
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suzieque

To her parents.

    Bookmark   July 6, 2011 at 10:07AM
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gellchom

Look at the envelope for the response card. It may or may not be addressed to the people who appear as hosts on the invitation. (That is the case in my son's invitations -- the invitation says [parents' names] request the honor of your presence ...," but the response cards are going to the bride.)

I would write the note to whoever is getting the cards in the mail. But you could broaden it to be to all of them. Or just say what you want without "Dear" anybody on the top.

"Thurgood and I are looking forward to celebrating with you! Congratulations. Love, Lurlene"

    Bookmark   July 7, 2011 at 3:34PM
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