kitchenwitchAugust 5, 2005

My SO surprised me with proposing during our recent vacation in Spain. Very romantic -- he brought a ring with him, did the one knee thing and everything. We have been living together happily for 8 years. But now we're fighting about wedding plans, and I find this very scary. (we never fight about anything else!) This is my second wedding, and his first. I would be fine with elopeing, but we've decided that a simple but classy informal ceremony and reception would be perfect. But anything I suggest, he vetos, but then he doesn't come up with anything concrete as an alternative. This is starting with just the invitations, the location, the people involved, etc. We haven't even gotten to the real nitty-gritty. If he wants to plan the wedding, that would be great. But he is not the type to do that -- he hates to shop, cannot coordiate even his own daily schedule, and I told him I'm not going to do all the work for him to then choose whether he likes it or not. I'm ready to just let it go and stay engaged forever. I'm sure we're not the first to go through this -- any suggestions, or are we better off the way we were?

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Ask him what his real issues are. I betcha it has nothing to do with wedding planning. Also remember, it may be your second wedding... but it's your first wedding to him.

    Bookmark   August 5, 2005 at 11:25AM
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for some reason guys get all freaked out about the official getting married business. my fiance has been pushing our wedding date back for about a year now... we were supposed to get married in may, then september... now we're getting married next june.... he says that getting married just scares the crap outta him because it means he has to grow up and be all mature. it's the start of your life together then you have to think about starting a family and all sorts of adult things... it's probably not about the actual wedding, but the fact that he will be someone's husband and that means that he has to grow up a bit and maybe he feels like his life will just not be the same afterwards...

    Bookmark   August 8, 2005 at 1:31PM
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