Thinking of Eloping...
Life story, shortened.
I am engaged to the best friend Ive ever had. We were best friends before we were in a relationship.
I have been married before...
I was young and naive, he was abusive. One night, he came home angry... and choked me against the refrigerator. After falling to the floor, I finally chose life and broke free. I literally ran out the door, down the street...and never went back.
I really disliked my first wedding. I had very little say in anything that went on. It was exactly like going to somebody else's wedding, as the bride.
Later, I became allergic to my wedding ring, until I could not wear it anymore.
Well, a wedding is supposed to be magical, exciting- filled with hope and promises. A marriage is supposed to be a partnership. Mine was none of those things.
I did not understand about love until I met the man who is now my fiance...
Now, as much as I want to be his wife, I cannot handle the thought of another wedding. Surrounded mostly by people you never see. People who are there for the food and the free alcohol. Staring like it's their eyes, only, that create and allow our love to exist. As though love must be paraded and accepted to be real. I cant be happy under the weight of a hundred eyes.
He is the best thing that ever happened to me...I dont WANT to flaunt this. I just want it to be my own.
If I did not consider, for a single second, the wishes of others, I would run away with him and be married in some beautiful, far away place. Nothing would make me happier.
But it is inevitable that others would be offended by that decision. My fiance's mother, for one. She is so traditional, and I am far from it...as much as i like her, I cant create a wedding I dont want, just to appease her. Can I?