Baby Mama Trouble- Will this ever work??
Here is my situation... I have been with my fianc� for almost 2 years (we just got engaged 2 weeks ago). He has a 3.5 year old daughter with his ex girlfriend/baby mama. Ever since we got together, she has been causing us nothing but problems. She has threatened to kill me and my dog, to burn our house down, to take their kid and leave the country, etc. She also claims to be sleeping with my fianc�, and then 5 minutes later will say we need to get along for the sake of the kid. She comes from a bipolar family so I am assuming that has something to do with it. My fianc� tells me to just ignore her because when I acknowledge her and argue with her, it is giving her what she wants and it makes it worse. My thought is I am not ok with ANYONE threatening me and my family and lying about us and I do not see why I should pretend that everything is fine when clearly it is not. I know she is jealous because she is not over him (she attempts to get him back regularly) and he was in a relationship with her longer than he has been with me (4 or 5 years) but was never engaged to her (he said he was not happy for most of the time and did not want to have a kid with her- she basically got pregnant on purpose to try to keep him around- she said she thought it would "bring them closer" when they were falling apart.) She is always using their kid against my fianc�, even though they have court ordered joint custody so we have the kid every other week for the full week (she tells me to stay away from her daughter even though her daughter lives in my house half the time and loves me.) She is just crazy. She has been in the nuthut several times, and was involved in several jewelry store robberies last summer. She doesn�t work and lives with her mother (drug dealer) and pregnant sister. She has also physically attacked my fianc� and his car. The whole situation is just not something I ever imagined I would be involved in and certainly is not the life I imagined. That being said, I love my fianc� more than anything in the entire world. I have been told the "baby mama drama" is never going to end and the thought of still dealing with this years from now kills me. She flipped out when she found out we were engaged, so I am assuming she will flip out again when we get married, and again when we have a baby, etc. I wish she would just get out of our lives but I know that will never happen because they have a child together. If she were not such a psycho I don�t think it would be so bad, but we are on such different levels. I am a little older, have a college degree, a good job and a decent family. She is the total opposite of me (people say this is why I am the wife and she is just the baby mama, & this makes me feel better temporarily but not for long.) Can this ever work?