gifts for unconventional wedding??

ad0856June 30, 2009

I am attending a wedding at the end of July for two people I have known for several years. They are very much like my 'second set of parents' - as they are in their 50's and 60's and I am 23. They have been together and lived with one another for just about 30 years, but have decided to get married at a local vineyard. It isn't fancy - they will probably be wearing jeans! At this point, there aren't any plans for a reception, other than a possible get together at their home afterwards. It seems kind of 'last minute' and very small - nothing fancy and very simple. At this point, invitations haven't gone out, I believe it's all word of mouth. I want to purchase a gift, but am unsure if that's the right thing to do for this type of unconventional wedding. If I should, what should I purchase? They obviously have everything they need (and then some)! I'm just not sure!

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By all means give them a gift. Purchaced is appropriate, but hand made would be good too. This wedding may be intimate and causal, but they aren't treating it as insignificant.

You know them better than we do. What would you give them for a birthday or Christmas present? That would be a good starting point. The info I have - vineyard, jeans, entertaining at home, have all they need - you might look at something like a cheese of the month subscription. I suspect they generally enjoy having friends over to the house for a glass of wine. This would make that even more fun, and have no clutter later.

    Bookmark   June 30, 2009 at 6:20AM
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Definitely give them a gift. People always like to be remembered. You can always give them a gift certificate to their favorite restaurant or tickets to a concert or sporting event. Think about things they would enjoy using rather than adding to what they already have.

    Bookmark   June 30, 2009 at 6:15PM
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Sure, give them a gift. The style of the wedding is irrelevant to your choice of gift, but your relationship to them as "a second set of parents" does. You aren't "getting them off to a good start"; they probably have what they need anyway. Don't worry about thinking of a wedding-y thing, and don't worry about it having to be anything big. Just get them something that you think they will enjoy -- as duckie says, just as you would for a birthday or Xmas. They will smile and think of you whenever they see it. I bet they would love something you made, or a pretty frame with a picture of the three of you in it.

    Bookmark   June 30, 2009 at 8:33PM
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Maybe a gift basket based on a shared hobby or related to the wedding? A nice basket with wine, cheese, a corkscrew, a stopper, some wine crackers, etc. I don't know what you can afford, but you can get good wine for $15 per bottle easily. If it is something you can afford (and something they would like and appreciate) you could add a very nice champagne or wine. You might want to add a little tag in it about it being for them to enjoy together so they don't feel obligated to dip into it at the reception.

    Bookmark   July 2, 2009 at 1:49PM
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Well, for late or 2nd time around weddings, I often give something monogrammed as I figure that is something they don't have. Restaurant certificates sounds good too. Or if they have a special interest like some kind of cooking--equipment or a cookbook. If they have a yard that could use a special plant, a lovely flowering shrub might be nice, but that would depend on the yard.

    Bookmark   July 2, 2009 at 10:49PM
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