At breaking point...
Where do I start.... I have been with my partner almost 5 years, married this April. We have 2 children together 1.5 & 3 with a 3rd due in September. My husband also has a son from a previous marriage aged 8.
I hate weekends we are all together. My step son ignores me when I talk to him, I am never included, I am made to feel invisible. I have been trying with him for 5 years... I can't do it anymore. I told my husband I would rather spend the weekends apart and spend as little time as possible together as they are so unbearable. My eldest child always spends his time with the older boy in tears as he takes his toys and makes him cry.
When we first got together my husband would see his son at his ex wifes house, with her there 3 times a week, it is now 2 times a week. I understand my husbands yearning to see his child however we have a very young family together and I feel I'm constantly left to deal with them on my own.
If I discipline my step child for example I watched him dig his nails into my son for no reason and told him off, he then cried and my husband comforted him and gave me the look of death. I do not believe I was in the wrong.
I'm tired if things failing to change over the years, we have had numerous rows about it and I'm constantly being told to keep trying, keep making an effort, I'm the grown up etc.... But there is only so much head banging you can do before you say actually I dont want my head to hurt anymore.
When I told my husband today I will be taking our children out and he can do what he likes with his son and was asked why, I honestly said because I dont want to spend it together. He asked if it was him or his son and I said both. He only focused on the fact I said his son and then makes me feel guilty for not being around and plays guilt trip.
I don't know how to change things. When he talks, he talks to my son or his dad. My names never included in any conversations. I'm miserable. I only see it getting worse with the introduction of my baby and me being left with 3 under 4's why he's with his golden boy.
Things are so bad I'm considering walking away and being a lone parent so i do to go through these feelings anymore.