Catch 22

mom2emallMay 3, 2009

Tonight the kids were having their almost weekly call with their bm's parents. As they were talking to her I thought of something. They call me mom so when they tell stories and say mom I wonder if the grandparents are thinking sometimes they are meaning their bm. So they probably do not even know it has been almost 3 months since their daughter has contacted her children. I am almost positive they funded her move back to our state because they thought it would give her a relationship with her kids again.

So tonight I was half thinking of talking to them after the kids and saying "is your dd okay? she has not even called the kids in 3 months".

But then I thought about it and if I did that then they would call her and "make" her call the kids. Then she would all of a sudden try to arrange a visit with them. They have swim meets the next few Saturdays and she is not reliable and they would probably miss them even if she promised to take them. We also have a few first communion's to go to in my family. So I really don't want the kids to miss out on swim meets and parties because bm feels obligated to be a bm all of a sudden.

But it makes me mad she is probably getting off scott free not having anything to do with her kids. She probably plays off stuff with her parents when they mention things about the kids...acting like she knows. I would not even doubt her telling her parents how she has attended swim meets and stuff!! SS was telling grandparents how he placed first in an event last weekend....bet bm acted like she was there to see it!

GRRRRRR......I just wonder how she can go months without talking to her own kids?? I have often wondered this, but it just never makes any sense to me. They are not even my bio kids and I miss them when they are gone with her for a night or when they go anywhere!!

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wild_thing

Their mother isn't "getting off scott free" as you put it. Just think about it. She can not get any of this time back with her kids. She is losing out on a lot of events in their lives. How sad for her.
Who cares how she acts around her own parents? They either already know how their daughter is or they hear things, or they will find out eventually. You shouldn't worry yourself so much about her, she obviously finds other things in life more important than her own children. She is selfish. It is a good thing the kids are with you and their dad so they do not have to be raised by such a woman.

    Bookmark   May 4, 2009 at 10:46AM
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sweeby

Kind of sounds like you want to 'tattle' on BM to her parents, and I can certainly understand why you'd be tempted...

But you're right that it can only hurt -- so don't.

They'll find out some day that the 'Mom' their grandchildren are constantly talking about it you, and they'll be grateful for it.

    Bookmark   May 4, 2009 at 11:28AM
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