To bring you up to date - rehearsal dinner
I thought I'd let those of you who so helpfully responded to a previous post of mine (under a different name; DD was afraid that FMIL would stumble across this forum and recognize my previous screen name) know that there has been a painless (we hope) resolution!
If you recall, I had posted about DD's FMIL planning to invite 60 or so of her husband's employees/spouses to the rehearsal dinner - folks NOT invited to the wedding. Well, about 3 weeks ago she asked me for the name of the wedding etiquette book I used!!! Apparently, she bought the book because, when she emailed me the rehearsal dinner list to proof, lo and behold, the employees had disappeared! Though it is still bigger than the kids would like, it is just wedding party, close relatives and out of town guests (mainly hers; I just couldn't bring myself to add anybody...not worth it.)
So, thanks to all for your valuable input and letting me vent. It was either that or say something that would have had unpleasant repercussions for FSIL and DD.
DD and I had a good chuckle over this; the rehearsal dinner list left off a bridesmaid - funnily enough, it's a bridesmaid disliked for no apparent reason by FMIL!!! Some things don't change.