Conflicting Events and Challenges
I have a new partner/widower in my life. I left everything I know: job, friends and family to join him in our new life together in his, now our home. The love we feel for each other is truly grand. Now if everyone saw that ;) And that is where the challenges begin and that is what you all have experienced - adult children. I have none and he has four and some grandchildren whom I haven't met. The relationships between everyone is strained because it's not been a year since their mother died. I cannot even imagine their thoughts and emotions they are going through when their father takes on a new partner within months of their mother's death. I'm trying to be patient and understanding. He is also trying to maintain a good relationship with them which again, I understand. It's just hard on me too. I have done nothing wrong, but I feel like the mistress and the outsider. They are still mourning and grieving, I would imagine and I feel that his bond with his children too are so important.
A current situation is that my family is coming to visit us and his family is not aware of this. I imagine it would bring additional strain and stress if we were to tell them. And then the questions is must we tell them everything? The reason I bring this up is because the adult children want to celebrate father's day with him, the same weekend my family is to visit. Other weekends are impossible right now due to being out of town. Do we tell them, does he go off and do his own thing while the outsider and her family hang out for awhile. I want to keep the peace and ensure he has a good foundation with his kids, and while none of this is about me, I do still hurt.