I cannot cope with my partner's ex wife and grown up sons. I am completely overwhelmed by the neverending bitterness.
That is to the point. What is going on with the ex wife? How long have they been divorced? How long have you guys been together? You are at the right place here, but there might be some other places where you can find help as well. Do you suspect that the exwife has mental problems, or has she been able to exercise control over your DH for a long time after divorce? Pls tell us some more..
Well the good thing is that the kids are grown so at least you don't have to deal with the ex every other weekend! But you have to give us more details so we can fully understand the situation.