Advice needed please (this is long, sorry)
I have 3 SK's SD13, SD12, SS10 that I care very much about. I have been married a lil over 6Mo and we all seemed to be getting more comfortable with our new situation. I have no kids of my own so having 3 kids in my house for long periods of time has been something very different for me. We play games, go to the park, bake, do crafts all sorts of things that are fun and we can spend time together. I actually look forward to our wkends with them. I thought everything was going good for the most part.
So, about a month ago I had noticed some odd behavior form the SD12. I had not been feeling good and was in my room laying down watching TV alot of that wkend. My DH and kids were getting ready to play hide n go seek in the dark so I was moving a few things so not to get broken and I was taking my lil dog in the room with me so they were not in the way. SD12 comes in breakfast room asking where I was as I was walking into breakfast room. I noticed she had a blanket in her arms. DH asked her what she needed she said "oh i was going to sufficate her" then looked at the knives on the counter and said "oh baby I should just use a knife". DH just said "now we dont say things like that" and they went on to play the game. Needless to say I did not have much to do with her the rest of the wkend.
I talked to DH about it, he tried to say oh she's just a kid. I told him that was not normal for a kid to say those kinds of threatning things. He said he would talk to her.
The wednesday after that he had a talk with her. She broke down crying saying she is still having a hard time with divorce and dad being remarried all of which we totaly understand. Then she said that she thinks that I dont like her. This is where I got upset because she and I have had alot of fun together. It was a week later that the SD13 told DH the same thing. Then this wkend SS.
This is very upsetting because I have done evrything I can to play with them, spend time doing things that we all interact, make special dinners,ect. Since all of this has happend DH and I are not getting along well. He has alot of guilt and is trying to choreograph what I do and say to his kids "to make them think I like them" when I do like them and have done nothing for them to think otherwise. They were in counciling but thier mom didnt want them to go anymore. DH met with her to over kids schedules ect. and she has agreed they need to go back.
So my questions to you ladies is'
Do I quit trying so hard?
Should I have a sit down talk with them?
Is there anything that I can do personally to help or fix this?
Has anyone else been thru this?
Everyone told me is was going to be rough but I had no idea.