step-daughter couldn't hack air force... moving back in with us!
I am writing out of desparation and praying someone might help me along the way. My stepdaughter (18) joined the Air Force 2 months ago. After completing 7 weeks of boot camp, she had an injury to her hip, and was unable to graduate. (She had sent us letters along the way, hinting she was not happy with the AF).
Consequently, she has decided to come home and has been diagnosed with depression. She had been in physical therapy to correct her hip issue, but decided she did not want to be in the "cripple ward" anymore.
Personally, I did not think it was that easy to leave the service, but this kid is a master manipulator. She has called her father and told us she is coming home. The past two years she spent with her mother. I have been with her Dad since she was 5, and been his wife for 11 years before she decided to move in with her Mom. (This was the fun place to be, and there were no rules).
I am an educator, and have really stressed throughout the years how important it was to get an education to further your life. It fell on deaf ears, and she eeked through high school with a D plus overall average. Her dad, (the love of my life), is a gentle soul who sees his little girl as a golden child, and expects me to be as thrilled as he is that she is coming back to live with us. I have never had an impact on her thought process, and now my worst nightmare is coming true.
She is coming back to live with us, with no job, no health insurance, and no desire to take classes from even a community school. Not to mention the diagnosis from the AF of depression.
Her mother has told her she cannot come back to live with her, as her other 2 children were told to get out the house when they were 18. So... now I am at a loss. I am the main bread winner, and have supported her for most of her growing up years financially and helping in all parts of 'child-rearing'. I was not blessed to have children of my own due to a hysterectomy in my 20's.
I am right at 50, and was looking forward to being able to travel and spend time with my husband. Now, that is evaporating. Any advice on words I can say to my husband that will help him see my side. He is a love, but prefers to put his head in the sand when I say things he does not want to hear.
I am really afraid this will take our marriage down. He is all I have, as my parents are dead and I have no close family left. Any words of wisdom? Thanks....