First of all thanks for being here. I really appreciate this forum.
My divorce was final last week. I was married (not the first time) to this man for 6 years. I was crazy in love with him and in some ways still am. The harder I worked on the marriage, the more I did, the less he did and the more he withdrew emotionally. It was a nightmare of cat and mouse emotional games, and finally he shut down and stayed shut down until the day I kicked him out and he realized it was over. I had to do a lot of soul-searching and really look at why I chose that man, and why I put up with so much abuse for so long. Now I know that by choosing him I was choosing someone who would abuse and abandon me because I was trying to re-create past scenarios, in order to fix them. Realizing that has given me the strength I needed to appreciate, for the first time, being single. And to enjoy working on being me. For the first time in my adult life (I'm 40), I am liking being single. So for those of you who are still hurting, please, there is light at the end of the tunnel -- I promise.