exchanging phone # - funny story and a poll

evaf555November 7, 2011

So, I was widowed about 18 months ago and have started dating. More specifically I have been trying to date. 55 year old women are not in high demand these days.

I was on a dating site, emailed a man whom I thought would be compatible, and we make plans to meet. He emailed his phone number "in case something came up" and I did the same.

That weekend we had a freak storm. (Our neighbors a couple states south are still dealing with the fallout) Forty minutes before the meet and greet I stepped outside to find snow falling and a slippery driveway.

I returned to the warmth of my kitchen, double-checked the number he emailed to me and dialed.

A woman answered.

I tentatively said, "I'm looking for Mike." There was a long pause. Finally, the woman answered,"Mike is my ex-husband."

I'm a quick witted sort, so this was not as awkward as one might think. But I sort of wonder, how could a man make a mistake like this? The numbers were not close. The first three digits were the same, but the last four, not at all. Ex-wife did give me a number, though. It turned out to be incorrect, and to her credit, she CALLED ME BACK to give me the correct one (she had transposed two numbers)

So my question is this: Is this a mistake that could easily be made? I'm widowed, not divorced, so I'd like another perspective.

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I'm not an e-dating type but.....

In such circumstances my opinion would be one strike and you're out. He's nothing to you. Keep looking. In any event, it was his error. If he wants to make it right, he'll call you.....but he won't. You should do nothing more.

    Bookmark   November 8, 2011 at 11:11AM
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Weeeelll, I've done something similar before when I moved and changed phone numbers. But I do agree with asolo -- if he wants to be in touch with you, he'll make the call. BTW, I think 55-year-old women are very much in demand. You just have to find the right group of people in that age bracket.

    Bookmark   November 9, 2011 at 6:20PM
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I agree with Eva - women 'our age' have to go to a nursing home to meet an eligible bachelor! Of course, there's always the VFW hall or the Senior Citizens Center. None of us think we act or look as old as we are - our minds deceive us, because we are 'old' and the men of today's world all think they are a young Elvis and want a young 'Marilyn Monroe' on their arm.

As for me, I just plod along every day, doing what I do, and don't worry about all the losers who can't see my value. I have done fine since my husband died - yes, I miss him desperately and yes, I get lonely, but I get over it with a good book or some gardening chore. I feel I'm better off alone as being stuck in a relationship with some old geezer who needs a caregiver! LOL

One of my most endearing 'relationships' was someone I 'met' right here on GW - it didn't work out for us, but I had a wonderful time with him.

There are ways of finding companionship at 'our age', but one has to look through mountains of coal to find a potential diamond, time most of us refuse to invest.

I want to wish you the best of luck in life, Eva!

    Bookmark   November 12, 2011 at 8:22AM
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"and the men of today's world all think they are a young Elvis and want a young 'Marilyn Monroe' on their arm"

I normally don't chime on in this group...but I read this and had to say something. After my marriage broke up 5 years ago and I was forced back into the dating world in my mid 40's, and started hitting the dating sites, I heard this complaint from women over and over...in their posts, in communicating with them, etc. "All guys in their 40s want a 25 year old bimbo..." stuff like that.

WTF? Sure there are your screwballs out there who find someone 20 years younger then they are, but they are usually either a) very rich, or b) don't have their heads screwed on right. Seriously, most men are not looking for someone out of their "age range". I went out with many women before I met the gal I've been dating for 3+ years now (she is 43, I am 47). Many of them I simply was not interested in after meeting them....either not physically attracted to them, no chemistry, or just at different places in our lives (I had young kids, some of the 40 - 45 year old ladies I dated had kids who were out of the house already...I didn't think that would be a good match, as my daily life revolves around my kids most days. I am sure after I either 'disappeared' after the first date, or kindly said I wasn't interested in a second, if asked, that some of those ladies probably used the "oh he's probably looking for a young barbie doll" rational.

Same way so many guys probably use the "oh, she probably wants a rich guy" or "bad boy" excuse.

    Bookmark   November 16, 2011 at 10:08AM
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