Friend seems to never want to drive to visit me
Hi all, couldn't find the right category to post in so thought I'd try this one.
I have a close friend I've known since high school, and we're in our 30s now. She lives in the same city as we grew up in, and I have family that still lives there as well. When I moved to a city 2 hours away, I think she only came to visit 3 times - she always came with another friend as a carpool, and never visited me alone.
I now live an hour away. Recently I went through a rough patch in life and this friend did come up to see me, however again this was in conjunction with our other close friend. Other than on my birthday, that has been the only time she's has visited me.
The majority of the time that we do see each other it is because I make the phone call and suggest arrangements, and this usually falls into weekends when I visit my family. This friend has never been much of a driver since we've known each other, and I guess I've never asked her why, but as far as I know she has not had any sort of traumatic experience while driving or being a passenger. In our group of friends, although we never spoke about it, I think we all realize it, and just have taken our turns being the one to drive.
Just this week I called up to suggest that we go shopping - at an outlet in my area. Her reply was that it was too far... and that besides that she had just gone to another set of outlets with her husband (a one hour drive past me from her home) recently.
I am bothered by feeling that I am doing all the work... making the phone call, making the drive, making the plans. We have grown apart over the years, but have said to each other that we have known each other for so long that it is an important friendship to both of us.
Any suggestions on how to bring this up to her without being pushy about it?