So you want to live to be old, if you have to be alone?
I see so may older people that are alone, and they have such a hard time. Some of them are taken advantage of by unscrupulous caretakers, which just makes me sick.
I don't think I ever want to get married again, and I also don't think I want to live to be really old. I know this sounds bad to some, but when I get to where I can't take care of myself, I want to have the option to end it. I definitely don't want to be a burden on my children, or on anyone.
That's one reason I don't want to remarry. I don't want to spend my waning years taking care of someone who can't do for themselves. That's selfish, maybe, but I've done my share of taking care of people, believe me, and I just want the rest of my life to be my own.
I think about this a lot, especially lately. I have lupus, and it's getting harder and harder for me to work a full-time job, due to my joint problems. I need a job where I can rest ever so often during the day, and what I'm doing now surely doesn't lend itself to that.
Stress exacerbates my condition, and the stress of the last week has me hobbling around like an old person. When I sit down, I can hardly get back up, and forget picking things up off the floor when I drop them.
Anyway, that's off the topic, but because of this, I know that eventually, I'd be a burden on whoever I am with, if I live that long.
How do you feel about this?