Need ideas for my 'coming out' party

sayhellonowApril 18, 2008

I guess that phrase has a different meaning these days, but what I mean is that I'm trying to get back into some sort of social life after breaking off a four-year relationship. So I need some ideas -- from everyone, but especially from you guys.

I'm thinking of having a small group of friends over for a get-together on my patio (if it ever gets warm enough, that is). I'd like a really classy but simple menu. If the recipes can be made ahead, it's even better. I don't know how to grill anything, so that's out. Otherwise I'm a pretty good cook and hostess.

He's a neighbor in my condominium complex. It's probably a bit spiteful (hanging head in shame), but I want him to know that I'm moving on and having some fun doing it. There will only be about six or eight of us.

So what do you think? Any ideas for me?

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Sweetie, there aren't many guys on this forum. You might have better luck asking for help in the entertaining forums, although I don't know of any forums that have guys on them, except the obvious ones. You might have to accept womens' suggestions!!! It sure sounds like fun, though.

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 4:42PM
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I want everyone's suggestions. I just thought some of the guys might have some that us gals didn't think about. Bring 'em on, Kay!

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 5:47PM
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Well, first of all - I wouldn't bring a potential love interest into a crowd = that's just me - I'd keep him all to myself, so we could focus on each other.

I would be straight-forward with this new guy! I'd simply invite him over for a meal - tell him you have fixed way more lasagna than you could ever eat by yourself, and you'd like him to 'help you' consume it!!!

You don't need to hang your head - you're free, single and over 21, so it is OK! Women don't have devious motives - we have PLANS! LOL

Seriously, the above is just how I, personally, would do MY 'coming out' party. I think your plans are great. Heck, ask him to teach you how to grill. It's not difficult - if I can do it, anyone can!

Make a wonderful relish/veggie tray, some different dips, a plate of deviled eggs, some little smokies and bbq sauce in a crock pot, some deli meats and buns, a cooler full of liquid refreshments, chips - the usual outdoor fare, and sit back and RELAX!

INSIST, in your OWN MIND, that this WILL be a fun and relaxing gathering. If grown adults can't fend for themselves, let 'em starve - you will be entertaining the cute guy!!!

Keep us posted on how things develop - we love LOVE STORIES!

I think our dear friend, Tinmantu aka Michael, will have a LOVE STORY of his own to tell, VERY soon - and I don't mean KC's!

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 8:04PM
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Grilling is easy once you get started. You may want to start with a small group of girls just to practice. But grilling is a sure way to attract the guys - the like to show off your talents. Whatever you don't know they would just luuuuuve to show ya!! For a small group, try grilling a salmon with mustard and capers - yummy. My girlfriend has a recipe that calls for the real mustard. It's so simple to make and tastes great - simple, yet elegant if you plate it right. A simple salad with mixed greens and grape tomotos, maybe some mandarin oranges or feta cheese. Wine is always OK - simple yet elegant,especially with the fish. If you have a Trader Joes near you, they are good for some quick apetizers. They have a low-cal dressing that is awesome for veggies and as a marinade. I don't do diet dressings, but I used it a lot last year and it was a huge hit. Try also the cooking Forum for some recipes too. If you don't want to bake, BJs and Costco have some great and different desserts. But if you are adventuous, try a bananna pudding or strawberry shortcake with real cake pound-cake (store bought if nec.), instead of those store-bought thingies that tase like rubber. Top it off with some blueberries. You may want to do a search on some theme parties too. This is all basic stuff but mostly easy, fun and will give you time to work the crowd!!

Have fun - and GOOD LUCK!!

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 10:08PM
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Hey Jo, I just raised him up over on the CS VI - wondered how things were going!! Do you have some news!! That would be fantastic, except we will lose a great trouble-stirrer - uh, I mean participant, here. Since he's been "busy", we don't hear from him anymore. That would be great news. He's such a great guy and deserves the best. Everyone needs company, especially as we to theses ages.

"hello", sorry to hijack, but Michael is a great friend here.

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 10:55PM
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Yep - he's been brave to come in and do battle with we gals! He loves women, and women love him!

    Bookmark   April 18, 2008 at 11:52PM
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OK, so I am jumping in here... I have lurked around for quite a while and not really found interest in most of the banter...
It all depends upon the guy. If you are shy/afraid then you may need your support group with you; however, that may throw a wrench into the mix and make him uncomfortable. Also, how do you know that he is not involved, etc...
Is there a couple that you know that knows him?
Here is what I would suggest:
Find something that you need help with and then when you see him ask him if he can help you with it (putting on new winshield wiper blades...). If he gives you a funny look let him know that your old BF used to do it for you.
!!!!!warning!!!!!! find out if he is able to do the job before you ask him. I know a lot of guys that do not know how to change wiper blades...

So, there is a guy that lurks around here but, to tell you the truth, y'all have some discussions that I am really uninterested in...

    Bookmark   April 20, 2008 at 10:25PM
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Don't know your age or situation, but....

"....I want him to know that I'm moving on...." is the first attitude I would suggest you abandon. Poisons the air. Puts an overlay of expectation on everything. Just be your (surely) charming self and let the rest flow (or not) as it will.

    Bookmark   April 20, 2008 at 11:46PM
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highcenter: I think I gave you and some others the wrong impression here. The neighbor I mentioned is the man I just broke up with -- not a new love interest. What I'm trying to do is "come out" -- meaning, I need to create some kind of social life for myself with both men and women friends, and I'm finding it little difficult. I was only wanting some fresh ideas for menus and so forth. (BTW, what kinds of discussions *are* you be interested in?)

asolo: My emotions are mixed and running the gamut right now from sorrow to contentment and most everything in between. The breakup is still so fresh that I seem to be on a bit of a roller coaster ride. It probably would have been more accurate if I had said that I want him to know I'm not pining away over him. But that was last week. Today is better and I feel relief along with a bit of joy. Sometimes I feel anger toward him because he hurt me; other times I feel sorry for him because I know he's hurting too and I want to soothe his hurt. I think all of these emotions are normal (whatever that is), but one thing I don't feel is bitterness.

gneegirl: I still feel too uncomfortable with the grilling idea, but I do agree with you that I should just try it out and get some techniques down. Dessert is a kind of no-brainer because they can be done even two days ahead. Thanks for the Banana Pudding reminder. That's an old-fashioned one I hadn't thought of in ages. I'm pretty good with a from-scratch Lemon Meringue Pie, and that seems to be a favorite with most. Any other recommendations on entrees and side dishes?

    Bookmark   April 21, 2008 at 11:37AM
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How 'bout lasagna and lots of red wine? A good salad, fresh bread and dipping sauce? All can be made ahead and allow you to eat and chat away....

And girls rock at grillin! I love to grill during the summer - lots less clean-up after. Fish, chicken, burgers. Yum. I bought a good grill a couple years ago - makes all the difference.

    Bookmark   April 21, 2008 at 2:49PM
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Lasagne and red wine -- now that's a combo I can live with, funkill, so thanks. Also have some good suggestions in the Recipe Exchange, so I think I'm covered now.

Yep -- I know I need to learn how to use the grill. It's on my To Do list with about a million books to read.

    Bookmark   April 21, 2008 at 6:02PM
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way to go, "hello"!!

Sounds like you'll soon be a pro at this party thing. I will tell you something about grilling. I have a tabletop grill that is actually pretty sophisticated. I also have a GF gas grill that has been a charm - really. I've just used it to death and the grill part looks as though it's about a had it. I'm worried that the finished is burned and it will begin getting into the food. So, I JUST purchased a new grill that is HUGE and HEAVY. I live in a house and have a covered patio so it works. The reason I made the switch is because I noticed that the small grill (tabletop) just got too hot to use for more than one or two items (like a steak or burger). If I wanted to cook a large amount of chicken or something that needed a slow cook, the food would cook entirely too fast. The new grill is OH SO NICE!! I can cook a single hot dog without it burning up in 2 seconds. So, just food for thought if you can get a grill that is more than a tabletop - maybe a small gas one. Not sure if you have a patio or a place to take a portable one. There are some smaller or patio sized grills that aren't table tops.

The other thing - the more "parties" you have the more you will have "regulars", including that "special" guy. hmmmmm...

Good luck.

    Bookmark   April 21, 2008 at 7:08PM
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Not sure what type of conversations that I am looking for...

So, I now understand your situation a little better. How about an evening of movies, board games, or cards. There are a lot of group board games and card games that really are fun and, no matter how juvinile or non-standard that you may find it, I have found that people always end up having fun playing them...

If you do something like that you can still do the lasagna & wine or you can do heavy munchies & wine or you can just do wine!!!

    Bookmark   April 22, 2008 at 9:07AM
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Deborah, we want PICTURES - so get some disposable cameras, give them to your guests, then when you get them developed, include some shots in the thank you notes. OF COURSE, you WILL post some here, WON'T YOU?! I think I'm as excited about this party as you are! Many hugs, Jo

    Bookmark   April 22, 2008 at 3:26PM
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Jo, you are so good with the creativity thing!! That is such a nice idea. Hope she goes with it.

    Bookmark   April 22, 2008 at 8:12PM
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Here's a fun game to play when it's a small group. Depending on how long you want the game to go on, give each person 5 pennies (or 10 for a longer game). Each person will take a turn saying something about themselves or some experience they had and put one penny into a container (bowl or small jar). The idea is to say something that most likely others in the group might not have experienced because the person that gets rid of all their pennies first wins! (BTW, we had a couple of cheap gifts for whoever won, but you don't have to.) For example, during your turn, if you say something like you were in the military and someone else has been as well that other person gets to put in one penny too. Hope I've explained it clearly. Just know that it's loads of fun and you get to know stuff about others that you never knew before.

    Bookmark   April 25, 2008 at 8:02AM
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Good morning, Eloise! That does sound like a good way to get to know others, but strip poker might get you a little BETTER acquainted and be cause for lots of laughs!!!

    Bookmark   April 25, 2008 at 10:15AM
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Eloise - that sounds like fun. I'm not a game player because I never played them a lot when growing up. Now, most of my family doesn't get together that much, and most of my close friends don't live close by. But, since you've brought this up, it's worth trying to have a get together.

"hello", are you getting all of this? Let us know how it turns out.

    Bookmark   April 25, 2008 at 8:45PM
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Too much Jo, you might also find out you don't want to know that much about another person in the group, LOL!

gng, it is a lot of fun. We played it at a bridal shower not too long ago, and we had lots of laughs. I too am not a game player; I never play cards, computer games, etc. I've played scrabble and monopoly with my grandson, but that's been a while.

    Bookmark   April 25, 2008 at 9:11PM
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Oh yes, I'm "listening." Thanks so much for all the ideas. I like the idea of playing table games. The group I have in mind is from several areas of my life and probably will not know each other, so the "pennies" game sounds like a great ice-breaker.

Thanks so much, all of you.

    Bookmark   April 28, 2008 at 12:20PM
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Hey - what about a mini "pennies" game here????

    Bookmark   April 28, 2008 at 10:13PM
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    Bookmark   April 29, 2008 at 5:33PM
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Yep - here. Of course it would have to be modified, and on a separate thread. The players would have to be ID'd first so we'll know who is playing. The other limits would be bacause of privacy issues. But maybe a modified version...?

Just a thought.

    Bookmark   April 29, 2008 at 7:14PM
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