friend or acquaintance
okay Â hereÂs my first topic - if this is not appropriate for the forum, just let me know!
IÂve had several years of "HanginÂWith the Girls" and have started wondering about the foundation on which they are based. IÂve maintained several types of girlfriends, ranging from 23 & single to 50+ & married w/kids. The dynamics of these friendships are interesting.
IÂve started to realize that I do not have the time (or want) to nurture all of these relationships. In addition to the typical home, pet and personal obligations, IÂve been spending more time with my SO, working OT, attempting to dedicate more time to my immediate family and starting school next month. I have to decide which friendships to preserve and which to abandon. Not so easy - not all friendships are what they appear!
Today IÂll discuss Ms Z. SheÂs one of my younger friends from work who IÂve been friends with for 5+ years. We are two of the few females in our industry and share similar backgrounds. But IÂm questioning the depth of our friendship Â we have diverse perspectives on The World. Because IÂm usually so depressed after an evening with her, I wonder if this is one to Go, but I just canÂt do it. She has had a lot of negativity in her life; abandonment & abuse, mental instability and poor health. She doesnÂt make friends easily (nor keep them for long) and I donÂt want to be another to cause her pain. I just know there is a nice person inside! She is intelligent, pretty, resourceful and conscientious. But she zaps every bit of energy and optimism out of everyone she contacts. Not only is does she constantly complain, but she is negative, argumentative, judgmental and critical. But, by far, her worst trait is that she insults people openly, in a matter-of-fact manner, and is surprised when they show offence. After 5 years, it just rolls off my back. She complains about not having many friends, but I canÂt bring myself to discuss it with her Â IÂm a wimp Â she is easily angered, offended and unreceptive! What do you do with these people? Can you help them?