Hi -new here:)

gzeeFebruary 24, 2009

Hi ya'll- I found this place while doing reasearch on single moms-and joined:) I have one son-his dad left us when he was a little over a yr old-he's all grown up now but I kept a journal for years about it-more about that later maybe:) anyway...Hello! ~gzee

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Hi gzee - gneegirl here. Welcome to the SLF on GW! This Forum is pretty cyclical. It gets VERY, VERY, VERY slow sometimes, but every once in a while it gets pretty lively. I'm usually here, or on the Kitchen Table Forum. I used to spend a lot of time on the Kitchen and Appliance Forums when I was doing my kitchen. Now I'm desparately trying to find "the proper paint color", and visit the Decorator Forum. Glad you are here. Jump in anytime you have anything to say. In other words, Grab one and stay a while!

    Bookmark   February 24, 2009 at 5:11PM
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We single moms refer to the totally absent fathers as "sperm donors", SD for shortÂabsent from contributing any emotional, physical or financial support for the child or children he helps bring into the world. They make a conscious decision to be this way. My SDÂs never ending list of bad habits and other questionable behavior began to show soon after the honeymoon period was over, and because of that I knew this: my son would not grow up to be like his father. I would raise him to be a good man...a man who believes in his family, loves his children and would never think to raise his hand to his wife. He would be honest and grow to be productive to our society, himself and his family. There was no way I would let him grow up to being anything but a decent person. He would be raised with values of God, family and integrity. Of course I have my faults, but I can say for a fact that I am a very hard working and honest person. And if I could teach him that, then he would grow up to be responsible.

The time had come to work hard and not look back. It was my responsibility to provide a safe and loving home for my child. It was one of the hardest things to understandÂdeciding what to do and how to do it in countless situations while trying to raise my son alone. And when your son begins to behave like your ex and his family, well, then itÂs a different ballgame and the rules change many times over.

When the dark side of SD began to come through and take over my son, well, letÂs just say that I was thankful that the life I had lived (even the very young years) that molded me in so many ways and gave me the strength to get through it all and to become the mom and person I am today. I am passionate about this subject because of all of it. I realize so many people have it a lot better or a lot worse and we may have a different set of circumstances, but I believe we can relate to each other because of events that have happened to us. We are not alone; there are countless women who are faced with the same fear.

When SD popped back in my sonÂs life in his early teen years, his lies and manipulation almost destroyed my son and I went on a "Moms Mission" to save him, he was making decisions that could literally ruin his entire life-I love him with my entire being-I can't watch him do this...where in the world do I go from here?

This is a page out of my journal. My obsession with saving my son made me realize so many other moms are going through this same thing and more. I turned my journal into a short story and published my book in November. I also built a web site to help be supportive of other moms-single or re-married who need to vent, laugh and talk about sticky subjects without fear of judgment.

Finding sites like this are so comforting and needed so much, Thank-you for creating it!

    Bookmark   February 26, 2009 at 1:12PM
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welcome Gzee, I wish my SD had been sterile, but then I would probably have been unhappy because I couldn't have those sweet little babies. I wouldn't have about them growing up. LOL

    Bookmark   February 26, 2009 at 2:00PM
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I left out "known" about them growing up in my reply. LOL hopefully I will be able to type with two hands soon.

    Bookmark   February 26, 2009 at 3:45PM
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LOL-no worries stargazzer:) I do the same thing-I was reading funny sayings and Mae West said "his mother should have thrown him out and kept the stork" LOL-
The sperm donor loses all the way around-the fact that those kind of "men?" are losers is one thing but really-we win in the end-:) and during too-hard as it can be:)they lose out on witnessing everything that is sacred-I win I win I win!

    Bookmark   February 26, 2009 at 4:50PM
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