This one's for the lurkers

TinmantuJanuary 17, 2005

What keeps you coming back here?....are you hoping that the dream person is going to ultimately going to appear on here?....Are you thinking to yourself that this site is dead and there is no sense in getting involved??

Well maybe if you do get involved and start conversation you might find that special someone that you never dreamed possible. One does not find their goal unless they seek it. Worst case scenario is that you meet a lot of good people to add to your life. What is so scary about that?

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Weeellll... I mostly lurk here, because I mostly lurk everywhere. I am a subscriber, but don't garden, I joined for the discussions in Household Finances & Money Saving Tips. Only discovered Single Life a couple of months ago. Hoping my dream person will appear? not at all! It actually hadn't crossed my mind.

I'll introduce myself. I'm 43, 3 kids 5,7 & 9. Divorced a year and a half, separated a year and a half before that. Only working 1 day a week - after not working for 9+ years. I wasn't really planning on ever having to support myself again. Oops, that was stupid. But part of being married is believing your spouse! Still a little bitter! But getting better!

Not much in the way of outside interests right now, just raising my kids. Joined a separated/divorce group at church a couple years ago, and don't know how I would have survived without them. They have been a great emotional support, as well as a social group for my kids and me.


    Bookmark   January 19, 2005 at 7:09PM
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Welcome Monica....I think all of divorcees' have a bit of bitterness inside...if one doesn't they are either naive or lying. I found my peace by getting involved in online single parents groups on yahoo and such years ago...(I'm going on 10 years now of being single)...I raised my daughter from 10 until 14 (she wanted to try to live with mom then and I didn't stop her)...she's 18 now and in spite of the divorce I think she has a good head on her shoulders and is going to turn out ok....I hope to see more of you around here.


    Bookmark   January 19, 2005 at 7:16PM
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Hi, Monica. It's nice to meet you! Please jump right in and say what's on your mind. At best, divorce is bad. I think most of us on this forum have 'been around the block' at least once. I will be looking forward to hearing more from you.

    Bookmark   January 19, 2005 at 10:25PM
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being a part-time newbie/lurker and occasional poster
i think all the different conversations are interesting .

    Bookmark   January 20, 2005 at 7:54PM
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Well, Zeke - we are so glad you joined our little group. A couple of us 'oldies' seem to stir up conversations, and are willing to let you 'newbies' take over for awhile, so let us hear from you!

    Bookmark   January 20, 2005 at 8:42PM
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Thanks for the welcome kayjones
i usually dont have much to say or talk about
as all of my hobbies and work keeps me pretty well occupied
as i am a welder i think about a lot of things while i am working .

    Bookmark   January 21, 2005 at 8:12PM
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Welcome to the board Zeke...I can relate to the being a working family man and not having a lot of time to pursue much else....I hope to see more of your posts

    Bookmark   January 22, 2005 at 7:31PM
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usually when i am not at work ,
i am enjoying my other hobbies some of which include
my Chickens and Goats and a little computer time ( which gives me time to warm up a bit) ,though this time of year there is not much joy in thawing out frozen water pans and braving the cold temps. which is par for the course this time of year .
a little more about myself even though i am probably getting off topic for this forum , i was born and raised on a farm and still work and live in the country ,when i was younger i decided to take off and see some country
so i began driving otr.and did that until i had gotten over the pain of divorce (which took the better part of 5 years )and by that time i was seeing a little gal that convinced me she was fair and as pure as the driven snow so we tied the knot and she (after going on 5 years )is now the mother of our 2 boys and maybe just maybe with another in the "breadbasket" .
so thats my story in a nutshell,

    Bookmark   January 22, 2005 at 9:18PM
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Hello Zeke - welcome - hope to hear more about your family's life on the farm. It's so foreign from mine - a beach raised gal who works on CAD/CAM design screen all day and wondering about other's life-styles.
Thawing water pans and braving the temps sounds intriguing to me - I'd love the chance to interact with goats, chickens, cattle, whatever. Those animals would be very refreshing from the animals I deal with at work!!! I'm not certain I could stomach the *reality* of the cattle/beef/dinner-plate side of your day, but then... you just never know. I have collected sheep collectibles since I was in grade school and chased them all over hills in Scotland one year (amazed that they just don't want to interact with me). Tomorrow night I start my sheep brain dissection in class. I don't think it will bother me at all - but years ago I would have puked!
I'll be thinking of your plight when I open my door and notice our 59 degree weather - which is very much welcomed in contrast to our 80 degree days so far this year in FL! (Boy, that's one bad sentence - my mother, the English teacher, would be so disapointed.)

    Bookmark   January 24, 2005 at 7:25PM
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Thanks for the welcomes! I'll try to be more active posting.

    Bookmark   January 25, 2005 at 7:36AM
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I was lurking then jumped right in ... but am busy with life right now so only check back occasionally ...


    Bookmark   January 26, 2005 at 1:10PM
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welllllllll, ... usually ( this time of year)its just the
basic chores of feeding and checking waterers .
as we buy the corn that we feed as opposed to raising it
as the grain prices are so low .
but about the time March rolls around the beef cows are ready to start dropping calves on the ground and if it does get muddy, there is a lot of work/time involved to keeping
bedding/hay out to keep the newborn calves out of the mud
as we dont have the facilites to keep all 80 head of cows
inside the barns/sheds .
and in the summer time it does get rather hectic at times
with the haying season in full swing .
as we usually shoot for 2 cuttings of hay, providing there is adequate moisture,for the second cutting to grow back .

    Bookmark   January 26, 2005 at 8:52PM
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