Mom's 'Will' makes me feel uncomfortable...
A little background...
My Mother is 80+ years old. I've noticed over the last approx 10 yrs (give or take), she loses track of what she's trying to say at times.
Well, not losing track of what she's talking about, more like just "stuck" on that one simple word she needs in the middle of a sentence.
OR, she confuses names - but then, with 7 kids, she's ALWAYS done that! LOL!
Just little things, but "I've" noticed it for a very long time, since I talk to her pretty regularly.
She comes from a very large family and there is history of alzheimers in her immediate family (siblings).
Mom and Dad have always just scraped by - we never were rich. In Fact, we were poor.
Dad passed away in 1992.
Mom has a houseful of "stuff" - some of which she has had since at least 1945 - when they got married. And "stuff" that she has saved all these years that "we" kids have given her for gifts over all these years. SOME of the "stuff" is things we made as kids - either in school or as a little art/craft project when we were young.
Now, years ago she told me that she has this thing set up... (I think she has a will, but, if so, I've never seen one. AND, she's not the type to have an attorney. Could be a "homemade job" for all I know.)
Anyway, her idea is that when she dies, EVERYTHING in the house is to be auctioned off, and the money divided amoungst us 7 kids. AND, her house to be sold - and that money to be divided evenly also.
Here's what bothers me...which I told her a long time ago: "You know that "collage" I made out of old Christmas Cards back in 7th grade? That you framed and has been hanging on your walls for 40 years? I want that back when you're done with it!"
LOL! Just Kidding...
But, what I DID tell her is that I think that anything she has that we gave her, we should have 1st choice if we want it rather than it going to auction.
I had recently read that SOME auctioneers don't really care about getting high price, but just sell quickly to get rid of "stuff".
But then, SOME of that stuff is NOT replaceable and/or cannot make up for the value in "sentiment".
I ALSO have been thinking about her house for awhile. She has NOBODY on title with her. I told her ONCE that she needs to set her house up with SOMEBODY on title with her...whether it's ME, or one of my siblings or ALL of us or??? I don't really care - just as long as she does it with someone who will be FAIR about things.
A couple of night ago, this thing popped into my head...if something happens to her, house is to be sold and the money divided. (It's not a lot - her house is only worth about $2-$300,000 tops! Divide that by 7 - (not to mention all the fees/comissions, and I don't know what, that will come off the top) - not a big chunk.
BUT, I'm on limited income. I'm so low I actually got a notice fm IRS one year telling me NOT to file any tax returns! LOL!!!
Now, If something happens, House gets sold and $ divied up, it MAY throw me into a position where I have to pay taxes on it???
OR, would I have to pay taxes anyway - no matter what?
And it's not just ME. This could affect any or all of us.
I pretty much "KNOW" she does not have anything set up as far as "Trust Accounts" for any of us.
I don't know how these things work - but I certainly wouldn't want the house and assets going into "probate".
I know that when HER parents died, there was ONE SON who was supposed to handle everything. Seems he DID handle everything - he KEPT IT to HIMSELF! There was friction amongst her siblings for years over that. I think that's why she thinks she's doing right by doing whatever she's doing...so as not to create friction amongst US kids.
I still think she should put ALL of us on title on her house with her. That way, it will not go to probate, and not ONE person has total control.
Geez, I'm so stupid in these matters! (They never taught me this stuff in school! haha!)
I KNOW this must sound cold and greedy. Not meant to be...I love my Mother and hope she lives another 30+ years. But reality is reality. People get whacked out about the inevitable. I try to get real about it.
Anybody been thru similar? Have tips for me?
I need to talk to Mom about this in person and in an intellegent way. I'll even pay for the attorney if that's what it takes to get things in better shape.
Thx in advance for any advice!