Step Grandma

wifetojoeiiiMay 9, 2013

Hi there - I do not post questions very often but I thought the crowd here would have a good response. My very dear Step daughter just had a baby son. My DH has 3 additional GK - they are my Step GKs. The 3 older Step grands call me by my first name - which is fine by me. My step D asked me if I wanted to have a different "title" - more grandma-like. I do not have any grands of my own...yet & probably for not the next 8-10 yrs. I suggested that the baby "name" me & I would go by my first name until he names me.

Can you give me any guidance?

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Why, yes I can!

I'm step grandma to three. My stepson asked me what I wanted to be called, since they have a multiplicity of grandparents. I suggested GrandMary, and it works perfectly for us.

Babies might well try to name you, but if you continue to say "Come to ____, or whatever, they will catch on and use at least a variation of that. So name yourself, and use it with the baby.

After all, it's how a baby learns "mama", "dada", etc. It's because the name is used!

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 3:07PM
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My kids call my step-mother "Grandma plus her first name." My mother is also called"Grandma plus her first name," My mil chose to go by "Granny" so she is "Granny plus her first name.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 3:09PM
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Do you have a problem if the child calls you Grandma? We also do the first name (or a last name) addition to keep it clear which grandma is which.


    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 3:21PM
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My step children's children call me Grammie, their father's mother Nona, and their mom's mother Grandma Lastname. They call my mother Grannie Annie. We called my own grandmother Nana, and I loved her so much I sometimes wish I had chosen that name. But there is nothing like the sounds of their voices saying "Grammie." I think your stepdaughter was sweet to ask you. I would definitely urge you to pick a grandmother like name. I think she is honoring your relationship.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 3:43PM
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When my first grand came to live with me at 6 mos. old.... I was too young to be a Grandma anything.... wife of the Capt. on a very small Military base with all those younsters around..... so I called myself Nanny. (happen to be in Scotland.... so Nannies seemed a good name). Now that the grands are all in their 20's, I am thinking that I need to go back to my OWN name.... that grandson is 37 and just had his first child, our Great Grand# 1. (BTW she is adorable, but will not be living close and I will be Nanny to her....also, I really loved being a Nanny to all my grands and their friends.).

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 3:48PM
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My friend, a wonderful step grandmother, did not want to 'step' on the toes of the other grandmothers by using a name too much like a grandma, nana, gram, etc might use.

she is Mimi, to her steps...fits perfectly.


    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 4:12PM
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My grandson has a sister, by marriage of his mother to another man.

His little sister adores me and I suggested she call me Ms G. She loves that.

My son and his wife, have two foster young teens, nieces of his wife, and they call me Ms G as well.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 5:47PM
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My DH, who is a step dad, granddad. The grands call him Tommy Dad, his first name and dad. They call me KK, my name is Karen. Just let them name you .

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 8:54PM
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I REALLY appreciate the responses! Ideally my own daughter's kids could name me first but that is a LONG way off if at all!

Pam25_f - yes my step daughter was wonderfully sweet to ask me. I cannot be called Grandma or Gramma, even with my first name - it would step on the toes of my step D's mother (my DH's ex) and she has VERY sensitive toes...

My MIL (great grandmother) is Nana, the ex is Grandma & and the other grandmother is Noni.

I like Nanny & maybe Granny; & trixietx - my name is Karen too & I like KK also.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 9:32PM
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It was sweet of your stepdaughter to ask. It is clear she wants you to be an important part in her childs life. Pick a name and tell her. I am Mamaw to mine and the other grandma is Grammy. Grandchildren are wonderful.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2013 at 10:35PM
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I am called Nana by both my step and my daughter's children. My own mother was also called Nana and it makes it very simple.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 6:42AM
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Memaw is also used by some - I am Grandma Bonnie to my step grands and Grandma by my own.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 8:36AM
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Several of my Grands were already of an age where they knew me as Ruthie when I married their Papa (but I had also been around for a number of years) and they already had a Nana so they continued to call me Ruthie and it was so cute it never bothered anyone, especially me...It was rather special to me...They knew I was the other Grandmother and introduced me as such...even as a 4 year I think they will call you really what ever they feel comfortable with...They were used to hearing me called Ruthie and that is what they felt comfortable calling me...

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 9:06AM
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Unless two grandmothers have the same given name, can't each be "Grandma (Given Name)". It's what we called our DS's grandmothers. I think there was more formality in earlier times. My grandmothers were "Grandma (Surname)". Using given names eliminates the confusion in a re-marriage situation.

Our DIL's family is of Polish origin so I am "Grandma", and DIL's mom is "Busia".

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 10:41AM
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I'm Mimi to my step-grands and grandson, too. Katie named me when she was about 16 months old and bumped her head trying to kiss herself in my mirrored coffee table :-) I did something to make her laugh and she thought it was so funny, she started saying, "Oooh Mimi, Oooh Mimi!" I just love it.

I didn't want to step on toes, either.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 10:53AM
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I'm Grandma2, meaning Grandma too since my grandkids have two grandmas. I'm GiGi (for GreatGrandma) to my greatgrandkids.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2013 at 4:36PM
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