Stray Cat Rules

renee_flNovember 2, 2005

STRICT, UNBENDING RULES FOR DEALING WITH STRAY CATS

Stray cats will not be fed.

Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with a little milk.

Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent residence.

Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled unnecessarily.

Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the house at any time.

Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain times.

Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days ending in "y".

Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on the really good furniture.

Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece, high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

Stray cats will sleep outside.

Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

Stray cats will sleep in the house.

Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with non-allergenic lambs wool pillow.

Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the foot.

Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.

Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed
under the covers except at the foot.

Stray cats will not play on the desk.

Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the desk when the human is asdfjjhhkl;ljfd.;oier'puyykmm4hbdm9lo9jUSING IT.

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Gina_W

Very cute, Renee!

    Bookmark   November 3, 2005 at 12:01PM
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annzgw

How true! You should submit that to Catfancy........I'd be surprised if they wouldn't buy it!!

    Bookmark   November 4, 2005 at 11:44AM
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Nancy_Ind_is_now_Ill

My current stray cat who has only progressed as far as the bathroom for isolation until his vet visit got a real chuckle out of this. Well, of course, I had to read it to him. LOL.

    Bookmark   November 4, 2005 at 8:38PM
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socks

Yep, that's the way it works!

    Bookmark   November 5, 2005 at 11:36PM
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oakleif

I don't know if this forum frowns on booting up a post. Some like it, some don't but this was so cute i thought it should do another round.
vickie

    Bookmark   February 24, 2007 at 1:46AM
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anita22

What wonderful rules! Is there a set for stray dogs?

(Since my DH is allergic to cats and even more allergic to the shots to prevent the allergic reactions, I can only dream about owning a cat....sigh.)

Thanks for brightening my day!

    Bookmark   February 24, 2007 at 8:14AM
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foosacub

That is too funny! It's like the story of every cat I've ever had!! LMAO

    Bookmark   February 24, 2007 at 11:43AM
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acorn

My six stray cats loved this post.

    Bookmark   February 24, 2007 at 1:38PM
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Dee1

ha ha ha ha ha That is TOOOOOOO funny!

    Bookmark   February 24, 2007 at 2:48PM
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moonie_57

I absolutely love that! 4 of my 6 are strays and those are the same rules we followed! *lol* Now we try to stick with rule #1, or there would be no end. :)

    Bookmark   February 25, 2007 at 11:17PM
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kygirl99

that is very cute. sounds like how we deal with all the strays we found. our latest is named Shelby and she is slowly graduating from downstairs to upstairs. (and this is the cat that my husband said he'd never allow in the house. ha!)

    Bookmark   February 26, 2007 at 8:24AM
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jannie

Too true.

    Bookmark   March 4, 2007 at 4:43PM
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sally2_gw

You mean people have cats that didn't start out as strays?

Sally

    Bookmark   March 5, 2007 at 10:59AM
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