I am so sad

loagiehoagieOctober 9, 2010

My yellow lab Duke is nearing the end. If it isn't today it will be very soon. He wouldn't eat this morning....a Lab that won't eat? Not good. He would be 14 on Nov.13 so I know in my head he has had a good long life...but my heart is breaking. I knew the day would come.....but this is just tearing me up inside. I don't know if he had a stroke yesterday or just went downhill so fast. He can't get up by himself. He did drink some water this morning and I fed him a little food piece by piece. I baked some chicken....so hopefully I can get him to eat some of that. It's so hard to let him go....but if he is suffering I know it is the right thing to do. Thanks for listening.

Duane

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Ninapearl

duane, i'm so sorry. it really does sound like he may have had some sort of acute problem and that, combined with his age, has left him with little quality of life at this point. can you tell if he is in any pain?

there are not many things harder on us pet owners than knowing the "right time" to let them go. for me, it has always been a question of quality of life. i would much rather see a pet go one day too soon than one day too late.

duke has depended on you all of these years to give him the love and comfort he deserves. it sounds like you love him dearly and now it may be time for you to extend to him one last act of love, to lay him to rest while he still has his dignity.

(((((((hugs))))))) in the past year, i have lost 2 beloved dogs, had to make that awful decision but i knew it was time.

nina

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 1:42PM
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beegood_gw

So sorry to hear that as I have gone thru it many times. (we do outlive our pets) If he isn't getting around or eating the kindest most compasionate thing you could do for him is help him Over the Rainbow bridge. He will be waiting there for you. Hugs ingrid

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 1:42PM
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quasifish

Duane, I am so sorry about your buddy. As a lab lover myself, my heart breaks for you. You sound like a good pet owner who will know what to do when the time is right.

(((HUGS)))

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 3:19PM
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petra_gw

I am so sorry. We have an almost 7 year old Lab, and they are such wonderful dogs. My best wishes for Duke, and for you.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 5:30PM
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sephia

So sorry to hear about your Duke. This is the hardest part of pet ownership. My thoughts are with you during this really tough time.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 6:05PM
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schoolhouse_gw

I feel sad too. You'll know when it is time, and it takes so much courage.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 6:22PM
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prairie_love

I'm so sorry, my eyes are filled with tears because I understand too clearly the pain you are feeling. It hurts so much. My warmest thoughts go out to you and Duke.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 8:07PM
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petaloid

Duke has had a life full of love, thanks to you. I know it is so painful, but you have the strength to get through this.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 9:51PM
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kcwithay

Oh boy do I know what you are going through. My heart goes out to you and Duke. Savor every moment with him, they are truly going to give you both comfort now and in the days to come.

    Bookmark   October 9, 2010 at 10:23PM
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loagiehoagie

Thank you everyone for your kind replies. It means a lot to me. Duke looks a little better today....still can't walk on his own but he did drink water and I hand fed him baloney and scrambled eggs. Last night I tried everything and the one thing he would eat was baloney....so baloney it is! I thought a few eggs would balance it out a bit. Heck, he can have whatever he wants at this point as long as he eats something! Potty is a challenge but for now simply an inconvenience. He is outside now with the other dogs lying on a comforter and just smiling that 'lab smile'. I'll take what I can get at this point...as long as he isn't in pain. What we do for our furry friends eh? But considering the years of love we recieved it isn't too much to ask for.

Duane

    Bookmark   October 10, 2010 at 10:13AM
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loagiehoagie

Mr. Duke can't walk at all. Two days ago he was stiff...but could walk a few steps. Yesterday he would go 2-3 steps before falling over. Today...he has no control of his back legs....so he is peeing and pooping as he lays down. He has been eating a bit and drinking water....but I know in my heart as hard as it is....if he cannot get up on his own....his body has simply given out. I love him so much....but I called the mobile vet and he will come out tomorrow. I know I will cry like a baby...but when he is that miserable and can't walk...in a way ..it makes it easier for my decision. He has had accidents over the summer....and I didn't mind cleaning up after him...but this is different. I know I will cry for weeks...I am an emotional guy....but I don't regret my decision. I would only extend his pain...and that is not right after all the love he has given me over the years.

Duane

    Bookmark   October 10, 2010 at 8:05PM
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ritamay91710

I know it's sooo hard, but you know in your heart you are doing what is best for Duke. He knows you love him. They just do.

    Bookmark   October 10, 2010 at 9:15PM
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calliope

Last year, in twelve month's time I lost a twenty year old cat, two sixteen year old cats, a fourteen year old cat and her nine year old daughter and our sixteen year old schnauzer. All but the youngest cat had lived out their lifetimes and then some......but it didn't hurt any less. I was numb by the time I bid the youngest good-bye when she got suddenly ill with FIP. I had to euthanise all of them but the oldest male cat, and he died in my arms just less than an hour before the vet was to open so I could help him leave this world peacefully.

We all know your sadness so you have good ears to listen. Give thanks for having him for his lifetime and knowing it was a good one, filled with love and happiness. When you boil it down to the essence.....that's what it's all about. Giving it your best and knowing you made him happy for a lifetime. I'm sorry.......

    Bookmark   October 10, 2010 at 10:21PM
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schoolhouse_gw

You will cry, Duane and you will feel better. When I decided to let my Lena go, I waited until the next morning to call the vet. All night long, I suffered the worst stress of my entire life anticipating making the call. I tried to sleep, but could not, turned tv on all night, slept in my clothes, up and down all night,crying.

And I have had to make that call many times in the past for dogs over the years. It was just different for Lena. After I took her in and she passed, I was so grateful I did it for her that a load, literally, was lifted off my shoulders. Even burying her wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I still miss her of course. Just know that you are not alone in your feelings.

    Bookmark   October 11, 2010 at 7:30PM
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loagiehoagie

Schoolhouse.....thanks for the story of you and Lena. Yes, I called my mobile vet this morning and wanted to delay everything until tomorrow. My vet called back and said tomorrow was pretty booked but he could come out tonight. I guess I was just trying to delay the inevitable....in the meantime my wife called and said Duke was not doing well...in obvious pain.....so I raced home to assess the situation myself. Yes, Duke actually had tears running down from his eyes and was clearly in pain. The vet came out tonight and we did the right thing. My baby Duker now has no pain and I sure hope he is up in Heaven playing with other dogs and keeping my mom company. After all of the tears and breakdowns over the weekend I was pretty well composed. Once I knew he was in obvious severe pain it made it much easier to let him go. Nice to second guess otherwise.....but it was obvious my sweet boy was in pain and not enjoying life anymore. Sucks anyway you look at it...but I'm not crying...I did the right thing and I know it. Makes a big difference.

Duane

    Bookmark   October 11, 2010 at 9:24PM
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homebodymom

I am so sorry for your loss. You did the right thing, and Duke is forever grateful. I too put my 12 year old Lab Willie down in May. Reading your post has the tears streaming all over again. It is still hard, but getting easier day by day.
Lots of hugs being sent your way ((()))

    Bookmark   October 11, 2010 at 10:29PM
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coconut_nj

Aw Duane, I'm so sorry to hear about Duke. I had to put my Pinky down just before she was 14. So very hard. I can't be glad that Duke ended up in pain, but I am glad it was so clear for you and you feel good about releasing him. You have my condolences.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2010 at 2:28AM
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lily316

I'm so sorry for your loss but you did the right thing..a final gift to the dog you loved so much.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2010 at 2:55AM
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Ninapearl

Old Dogs Never Die

We have a secret, you and I
That no one else shall know.
For who, but I, can watch you lie
Each night, in fire's glow.

And who, but I, can reach my hand
Before we go to bed
And feel the living warmth of you
And touch your silken head.

And only I walk woodland paths
And see ahead of me
Your small form racing in the wind,
So young again and free.

And only I can see you swim
In every brook I pass.
And when I call
No one but I can see the bending grass.

(((hugs))) duane
RIP duke

    Bookmark   October 12, 2010 at 6:42AM
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deb18

So sorry for your loss. I'm glad you're at peace with your decision now.

ninapearl, that was beautiful and brought tears to my eyes.

    Bookmark   October 12, 2010 at 8:40AM
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mamacotti

Hi Duane...Good to "see" you again, although I wish it was under better circumstances...(((hugs)))

I held my breath reading this whole thread. I was so afraid of just that. I don't know if you remember, but I also have a 14 yr.old yellow lab, Buck. He's aging, for sure, and it's killing us to watch.

My heart is broken for you and your best buddy. But the pain is gone, and he's keeping your mom good company! You will see him again...
Suzie

    Bookmark   October 26, 2010 at 1:03AM
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mamacotti

Okay, I was crying when I wrote that last night....

Buck is 11, not 14.

    Bookmark   October 26, 2010 at 10:36AM
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prairie-girl

I am so sorry for your loss, Duane. It is a very hard thing to go through. We had to put down our 'puppy' (of 9) last week due to a herniated disc in his back. I still cry every day for him, well not 'for him' - he's better off I know. It's for me I cry, even though I know it was the right thing to do.

I am going to post a link to another recent thread here. So many people said so many good things. It really helped me when I was facing the decision. This seems like a wonderful, friendly forum.

My puppy is keeping my mom company up there too! :o)
~Missy

Here is a link that might be useful: link to previous thread

    Bookmark   October 26, 2010 at 5:03PM
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yborgal

I'm so sorry for your loss. You made a difficult decision, but it was the right one. Duke is at peace now.

Mona

    Bookmark   October 26, 2010 at 6:43PM
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jannie

I'm so sorry. I've been through this many times. For me, "The Right Time" is when I realize the animal will never ever get well, even if it eats a little and rallies for a day or two. I know your heart is breaking. I believe you will see your boy again at Rainbow Bridge.

    Bookmark   October 26, 2010 at 8:38PM
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spedigrees z4VT

I am so sorry for your loss. Duke had a long life, and it was his time to go, but that doesn't make your pain any less.

My collie is 12 and my sheltie 14 so I know that great sadness looms on my horizon as well. It is never easy to lose our long time companions.

Rest in peace, Duke.

    Bookmark   October 27, 2010 at 6:23AM
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loagiehoagie

Mamacotti, Spedi, Mona, Jannie and Prarie...(hope I didn't miss anyone from the last couple of days)..thanks so much for your kind words and condolences. Now that it has been close to three weeks I can tell funny Duke stories and laugh and shake my head in amazement at some of the goofy things he did over the years. Of course I will cry from time to time and I miss that big ole' dawg so much it hurts.....I know time will make the happy stuff overtake the last couple of days in my memory bank.

Then night before last my dad called in tears....his 7 year old Shih Tzu collapsed and died on the stairs. One minute the dog is eating and playing and the next....gone. I suppose the moral of this and life in general is try to enjoy every moment...be happy...because we don't know what is in store the next. I really appreciate all of your kindness and I will post some Duker stories later...there are a lot of them! Somebody told me I should write a book...but I think the guy with Marley beat me to it!

Duane

    Bookmark   October 29, 2010 at 9:56AM
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Ninapearl

duane, i'm so sorry about your dad's lil dog. :( you are so right...we never know what life will throw at us from one moment to the next. live like today will be your last!

i enjoyed the stories of duke and look forward to more!

write that book...every dog is special in its own way. marley was one, duke is another! :)

    Bookmark   October 30, 2010 at 12:07PM
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debbie_2008

I read this thread through tears. You did the right thing.

I had to make the same decision in September with my 15 1/2 yr old doxie. He couldn't stand or walk more than a few seconds/steps either. It is never easy.

    Bookmark   November 9, 2010 at 2:36AM
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liane_2010

My deepest condolences Duane about Duke. I think Duke told you himself when quality of life has ended, then the decision as hard as it is, is what is best for your best friend. Google the Rainbow Bridge poem if you are unfamiliar with it.

    Bookmark   November 9, 2010 at 9:53AM
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