Please Help - cat died and now another is acting out

renee_flFebruary 27, 2010

I just had to had my sweet Ernie put to sleep this week - he had lymphoma. I am just devastated. My oldest cat Jack is now acting out. We caught him peeing in the house twice and have found pee in two cat beds. It seems to be in places that Ernie used to sleep. Ernie had a number of health problems throughout his life and he "told" me something was wrong (he had a UTI from crystals) by peeing in the house. Then Jack would get distressed and try to cover it which is how I always knew. I am utterly shocked that Jack is doing this now when it always stressed him out when Ernie did it. Jack has NEVER done this before. I don't know if this has any bearing but he now scoops lots and lots water out of his bowl and then licks his paws. He has never done this either and he isn't paw dipping to drink water. He seems to be sloshing the water out of the bowl and then licking his paws. We just caught him peeing on the leather couch. I don't know what to do. I know he must be grieving too but I can't have him destroying my house. We are trying to give him extra attention. I am afraid that locking him up will make things worse. I should also tell you that Jack is hyperthyroid and has arthritis. Please help!!!

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I am very sorry for your loss of Ernie and the grieving that it is causing both you and Jack.

It's very possible that Jack has developed stress-induced cystitis which is causing his inappropriate eliminations. You should take him to the vet for a check-up. Also, continue to spend lots of extra time with him, comforting him, trying to help him over his grief.

This is exactly why I always make sure my other animals can acknowledge the body after one of them passes. I have found that it reduces or eliminates grieving and stress in the other animals as long as they can see and smell the body. Otherwise, they have no concept of why their companion simply "disappeared" and never came back, and that can be extremely stressful and frightening for them. I try to have my animals euthanized at home, but if that is not possible, I always bring the body home and lay it on a dog bed in the livingroom overnight so that the other animals can acknowledge the passing. It's amazing how readily they can accept death as long as they know that's what has happened.


    Bookmark   February 28, 2010 at 10:41AM
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I did bring Ernie home in a cardboard "coffin" and layed it on the floor for Jack and Lola to sniff (which they did). I am trying to hold myself together too because Jack is very close to me and I know he gets upset when I am upset. I plan on calling my vet tomorrow and taking him in. Other than peeing inappropriately he is acting normal. The only difference at all that I can see is that Jack and Lola are now laying pretty close to each other - even slightly touching - which is something that they never did before. I cancelled plans today to stay home with them and I am trying to give them extra love and attention. It's hard for all of us. Thank you for your kind words and timely response.

    Bookmark   February 28, 2010 at 11:59AM
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I am so sorry for your loss. I hope Jack's peeing all over can be cleard up quickly and easily.

It's good that you were able to stay home with Jack and Lola during this difficult time for you all.

I am sending peaceful thoughts out to you......

    Bookmark   February 28, 2010 at 2:07PM
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I'm so sorry about your kitty. My girl kitty acted out something awful after her brother passed away- she would yowl loudly all night, among other things.

One of the few things that did seem to help with her was to use some homeopathic anxiety drops made specifically for cats and dogs. We would just give her a few drops when she seemed like she was getting worked up and it would help her calm down. The drops are similar to Rescue Remedy, but perhaps more specifically aimed at animals with anxiety. I found them by searching around Amazon and reading reviews.

Great idea to talk to the vet though and make sure the stress didn't trigger something physiological that can be more easily remedied.

((((HUGS)))) for you all.

    Bookmark   March 1, 2010 at 10:29AM
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