Pacifier problems and bad dreams!!!!

DatdogDecember 1, 2001

Ask me if I feel like a horrible mom? Yes, I do...

I've been trying to take my 2 3/4 year old daughters 'binkie' away from her as she would suck on it all day if I let her.

SO what i've been doing is telling her she can suck on it if she stays in her room. She does understand this concept as she's pretty bright (smarther then me I think,LOL)

Well that works for about a couple minutes then she's out of her room sucking on that darn plug. SO I take it away. She cries, I interest her in something else and then it starts all over again about 20 times a day.

I can say she's getting a little better, but still have a LONG way to go.

ANYWAY, just a little bit ago I heard her crying went in and checked on her and she was having a bad dream. She kept saying over and over, I want my binkie, don't take my binkie, she never woke up- so I know she was dreaming! AHHH it brought tears to my eyes. I never would have thought this would affect her dreams. I can only imagine the stress this is putting on her, I never would have guessed. Guess I know why she's been so crankie lately.

Do you guys think I should back off? Try another approach to taking this darn pacifier away.

Oh, I did try the cutting the top's off of them, she didn't care, advice- PLEASE.

Kristi- feeling like the worlds worst mom.

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When my daughter was about 2 1/2 or 3, we decided it was time to drop the bink as well. It was hard at first, but then she got a cold. We explained to her that the bink was sick too, and needed to sleep. When she would wake up, she had to leave the bink in her bed to "rest". After about a week of letting it "rest", she was pretty much used to only getting it at bedtime. Sounds kind of silly.....but I guess it makes sense when you're that young!!

    Bookmark   December 2, 2001 at 2:45AM
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My oldest was around 20 mo when we took hers away. She was only allowed to have it in bed, so when she needed "a fix" she would just go and lay down for a few minutes then go back to whatever she was doing. I tried cutting the tips off of hers to and she would say "it's okay, we can fix it". That killed me!
With my second we started about sixteen months- I wanted to start before she was talking well enough to add to the guilt. She was also only allowed to have in bed, car seat, and when we were out at a resterant or something. First I started taking it away after she fell asleep- that way she wasn't sucking all night. Then I cut the tips off- she didn't care too much about that- but after she started useing the ones with the tips cut off she started biteing them. One day- about a week into it- she bit the whole rubber part off. After that I took it away cold turkey and didn't feel guilty at all because I saw it as a choking hazzard.
The second was relativly easy- it's a lot harder when they can tell you what they are feeling. I don't think there is any easy way to do it. Just be prepared for a rough few days to a week when your weaning. Good luck!

    Bookmark   December 2, 2001 at 11:46AM
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We took "bobo" away cold turkey at about 2 3/4. The first day was rough - she didn't cry but she asked over and over (and over and over) "I want my bobo". Kids are good at repetition - I think they knows it gets to us.

But then it was done. She still has blankie - at least it doesn't cause orthodontial problems :-) - but no bobo.

I think all or nothing is best with the pacifier. They may be confused and not understand a gray area attitude ("You can have it only when sleeping, or only when sick, or only when...")

    Bookmark   December 3, 2001 at 7:27AM
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In trying to be nice you are making it worse on her. Either take it away cold turkey or let her have it no strings attached. Battling 20 times a day is making you and her obsessed to the point where she's dreaming about it.

    Bookmark   December 3, 2001 at 12:21PM
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I guess I disagree somewhat... Our DD is almost 2 1/2. About two months ago we cut out have her "paci" at night. (She had mostly only been using it at naptime and bedtime). She was upset at first, but we just told her it was dirty (her favorite one was). SO she got over it. Now she's asks for it at bedtime once in awhile. We say no. And she says "only naptime." So she is fine with only having it at naptime. At some point we will cut it out at naptime too, but not yet.

So I don't think I agree with the all or nothing... Although I may change my mind when we go through the stopping it at naptime scenario...

-Tara W

    Bookmark   December 3, 2001 at 9:14PM
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Our DS kept losing his and we would turn the house upside down trying to find it. So finally we weaned him off it by not finding it.


    Bookmark   December 4, 2001 at 1:41PM
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My so was about 2 1/2 when we decided to take the pacifier away. He would suck so much on his pacifier that a small hole would end up on the bottom. Well when he sucked it after there was the hole , it made a strange sound he didn't like. Needless to say I decided not to replace the pacifer (as I had done in the past when this happened)and told him it was broke and there weren't any more to buy!! I guess he bought this. He would put it in his mouth and it would make the sqeak squeak sound he didn't like with it having a hole and he would take it out and complain and I would say how it was broke.

At bedtime I began to lay in his room on the carpeting as he went to I moved to the the hall he could not see me and would ask if I was still there...this made him feel comfortable knowing I was around. I would stay there until I could he went to sleep. The eventually it wouldn't take any time for him to go to sleep and I would very quietly move further away from his room. It actually took about 2 weeks, and I was a stay at home Mom but it did work. I selected Christmas holiday when I knew my daughter would be out of school and I could be more flexible with her sleeping in case her brother while getting off the pacifer cried and kept her awake for a long time. He did do some crying at first but then stopped.

This method may seem strange, but it worked for us. I guess everyone has their own way of doing it, but after a few days of trying off and on to suck on his pacifer and it making a loud squishy squeaky noise he more or less went cold turkey on doing without the pacifer that was broke.

Good luck!

    Bookmark   December 11, 2001 at 8:11AM
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