Help with toilet training.

Christina_ozDecember 1, 2001

Hi everyone,I have a 2 1/2 yr old boy that was weeing on the toilet great. But of late he is refusing to use the toilet and will even do a poo in his nappy not telling me and will happily play in a dirty nappy till I smell it.

I'm finding this really frustrating. I don't want to push him to train but as we have tried the reward system I was wondering if anyone out there has any more ideas,or should I just back off and wait longer to start again. He's a beautiful child but very stuborn.Thanks for reading.


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I have the same problem with my 2 1/2 year old daughter. Some days she does great and will go the potty all day long (even poop), then other days she screams and refuses to go on the potty and will pee on the floor. We have tried the reward system, we also tried telling her that peepee on the floor is wrong and would have her sit on the potty, but that just upsets her more. I have decided to just let her do it on her own. I remind her a lot and then make a big deal out of it when she does sit on the potty. Good luck. I know how frustrating it is.

    Bookmark   December 1, 2001 at 8:20AM
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It's just the age. My son was into potty training for about two weeks~that was about a month or more ago now. You can't force them to use it and statistics show that most kids are 3 before they get potty trained. They have to learn that they have to go and need to use the potty for it to work. I read in a magazine that at this age the kids think that diapers are working just fine, so why change? Good luck! I'm hoping it happens soon, too.


    Bookmark   December 1, 2001 at 2:44PM
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My son is 3. He used to do both poo poo and pee pee on the potty, not consistently, but to the point that we got excited about not having to buy pull-ups any more. Now he hides and poops, and if he's busy, he won't go on the potty. I think he figured out that this is something he controls. When we ask him to sit on the potty at the time we would think that we will go, he says his guy doesn't work. Sometimes I feel like he will be wearing depends at his High School graduation. At pre-school they said that this is normal and that one day, he will tire of the pull-ups and go to big boy pants. We have tried to "force the big boy pants" and take the pull-ups away. Have you ever cleaned a poopy out of big boy pants? It's disgusting, and it goes thru the pants. We were doing this every day, 3-4 changes a day until we switched back to pull-ups. We are back to praising him when he goes on the potty and telling him when he "misses", that we sure wished he would go on the potty like a big boy. We have also said that Santa goes on the potty, and he is very happy when my son does too. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. This is a weird age. I heard boys were harder. I just wish he would get thru this stage.

    Bookmark   December 3, 2001 at 9:00AM
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We're in the same boat. 2 wks ago we started taking him to the potty every 1/2 hr or so, and it worked pretty well. Every time he tried to use the potty, he'd get a little candy. (we like sweet tarts, chocolate chips, etc) if he actually goes in the potty, he gets a few more candies, in a little dish. 3 or 4. and lots of praise. Since DS LOVES to eat and never gets sweets, this seems to be working well.
then last week we had a setback where every invitation to pee in the potty was met with "NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" and screaming. we let him use his diapers exclusively, left him alone about it.
now this week, he's interested again. He says "I wanna treat" and runs for the bathroom. (no, we don't keep our treats in the bathroom!) :)
I think if you want to go with the reward system, pick something they *really* like. Matchbox cars are $0.99 a piece, and would definitely interest my son enough to pee. my older sister used to keep a big jug of plastic toys on top of her fridge, and she called them poo-poo presents. They were just junky little party favor type toys.

whatever works. I feel your pain. I'm due with #2 in july, and want a few diaper free months before I start all over again!!!

    Bookmark   December 5, 2001 at 5:39PM
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We had the same thing happen with our daughter. I switched to regular, thin panties. When she wet them, I had her take them to the washing machine and put them in the bin (we had a special one for training pants), then she had to get a new pair out of her dresser drawer and put them on. This happened twice, and she hasn't pee-ed in her pants since. I don't know if it was the panties or the clean-it-up-yourself part, but it worked. Get out of her way if she's running to the potty yelling "I got poo-poo! I got poo-poo!" She's a locomotive. Now, she is potty-training her little sister.

    Bookmark   December 6, 2001 at 12:35PM
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Do you think that just taking away the pull-up and putting him in under pants is worth another try for us? He didn't do weel the first time. We would love for this work.

    Bookmark   December 6, 2001 at 4:09PM
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We never used pull-ups, just cloth training pants. My daughter was never fazed by the poop or pee in diapers or training pants, and it was difficult keeping up with the laundry. When we switched to regular panties, it was as if she realized she pee-ed at the time she did it and was able to put two and two together.

Another thing to consider is your son's current temperament. If he is in a particularly defiant stage of his terrible two's, you might be beating your head against a wall. With my daughter, I have noticed that there are some weeks that are worse than others.

    Bookmark   December 6, 2001 at 10:49PM
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My son, 9/27/98 is a bit over 3 yrs. He is a big boy (95th percentile) about 43 lbs. We could never find the cloth training pants that would fit him, only pull-ups had the extra large. Alst night we went to cloth underwear, and we made a big deal out of it. They were space man under pants, and they were really cool. He had an accident about 2 hours later. He hid in the play room and pooped in his pants. We took him to the bathroom, and told him that he had to help us clean him up. We told him that this would have been alot easier if he had gone in the potty and not so stinky. We told him that he needed to go on the potty, or we would need to go back to diapers. He was not about to go back to diapers, so he begged for the big boy pants. He stayed dry all night and got up this morning to go potty at 6:30 am. I think we are going to stay with the big boy pants and retire the pull-ups. I am sure that this is a messy road in the future, but, if he knew to go and hide to poop, he knew could have gone to the potty. We sent a few pairs of underwear and pants to pre-school this morning and started our journey. He cried when I left him, this is not like him. He held onto my legs and buried his face. I think maybe he knows that this is the beginning of being a big boy and maybe by moving away from pull-ups will distance us. I am not sure, but I reassured him that I loved him and that I was am very proud of him. I told to he need to go on the potty today, and I waved to him through the window. I hope this works.

    Bookmark   December 7, 2001 at 9:50AM
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