how to stop the whining of 8 month old

nicvFebruary 19, 2006

how do you stop an 8 month old from whinging and whining all day long! this has been going on for months and i constantly attend to childs cries and end up carrying him around quite often. he screams if i don't give him attention and also won't learn to crawl - screams if i put him on tummy etc. he is now standing up and leaning against furniture so should i just give up on the crawling thing. i can't reason with an 8 month old child so is it ok to just ignore him and let him scream or is he too young to do this. i want him to learn some independence but dont want to do the wrong thing and have him end up a basket case.

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lindac

Has he been to a doctor lately? He may be whining because something hurts.
Don't make a baby crawl....he will do what he's ready for.
If he has been whining for months and doesn't like to be on his tummy, you need to get him to a Dr.
Linda C

    Bookmark   February 19, 2006 at 1:39PM
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carla35

Is he whining or crying? Whining doesn't usually start until later. Many kids are colicky and cry a lot even still at that age and like to be carried, but there could be a medical problem. Does he have reflux or food allergy problems? Is it worse at certain times of the day? As Linda suggested I'd talk to a doctor to rule out any medical problems first.

If there is nothing medically wrong with him, you need to choose what is best for you in terms of letting him cry it out. There are different theories about what to do but only you know yourself and your baby. You simply may need to take a break and a little crying isn't going to hurt, IMHO. But, I also don't think you can spoil a baby that age. There should be some sort of happy medium you can come too. Don't worry about what others think is right, just do what you feel is best for everyone involved. And, remember your sanity is important!

Also, I would not overly worry about him not crawling. Some babies skip that stage altogether. But again, be sure to check with a doctor to rule out any medical problems.

    Bookmark   February 21, 2006 at 12:54AM
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trekaren

At that age, if hunger, gas and soiled diapers are ruled out, something else could be wrong and definitely you should take the child to a doctor.

(my daughter never crawled, by the way; went straight to walking on her 1st birthday).

    Bookmark   February 21, 2006 at 8:17AM
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nicv

Thank you to everyone who responded.
i might try a different paediatrician - i tell the one i use that he keeps crying and when he dictates his notes he says he's a happy child. i don't think he wants to take an interest in the problem and is just happy to charge me $90 to say come back in six months if still a problem.
thanks again.

    Bookmark   February 27, 2006 at 4:02AM
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trekaren

nicv,
Yes switch. My daughter went until 2 years old with food allgergies undiagnosed by that particular doctor who kept telling me 'she just has sensitive skin, you're drying her too hard after her bath, use a softer towel and lotion'.

It wasn't until I visited a nearby urgent care, once her rash turned into breathing distress that we got a solid diagnosis to work with!!!

    Bookmark   February 27, 2006 at 1:48PM
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athomein1914

It is absolutely normal for a baby to want to be with his mother, and to be held. Really!!! Independence is born of trust, and a child whose needs are met and who feels secure in his world will move naturally through the developmental stages.

It's so hard for pre-verbal children to communicate -- imagine if you could not communicate with us here, your friends and family there!

Many babies crawl at nine months or later.

And, of course, it's important that you can communicate with your baby's health care provider. Maybe you have several things going on -- a child who wants to be held, an undiagnosed sensitivity, mixed communication signals, who knows.

I hope it helps to consider that babies are different and one baby may "tolerate" less attention from his mother than another. Generally speaking, babies will communicate their needs and it's up to us to understand, and to decide how we wish to communicate back.

How wonderful to have a baby want your arms! As exhausting and endless as it seems today, the day is fast approaching when you'll ache for his weight in your arms again and the glorious baby smiles and antics. Soon enough your growing child will worry your days and nights with "independent" behavior!!!

    Bookmark   March 3, 2006 at 1:03PM
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stella_2006

My son just turned 1 and he goes through kind of the same thing. My daughter who is 3 was always very calm baby and just seemed to 'get it'. She walked at 10 months and said 5 words by the time she was 1. My son didn't even attempt to crawl until he was 9 months old and now he is no where near walking. He only says mama. He gets frusterated very easily and will just sort of cry all day long. I think it's just the way he is. He needs a little more assurance and for me to speak soothingly as he tries something new. He just sort of short circuits and freaks out if he can't fit the ball into his drop and roar dinosaur or if I stand him up and try to let go he shakes and screams and lunges his little body at me. He is just a tightly wound little kid and I have just learned not to get annoyed, take a deep breath, count to ten and try to be understanding and give him what he needs. Since he is my second, I don't worry that I did something wrong to make him this way because my dd was the perfect child. It's him not me, but I still have to change my parenting style to fit his high strung little personality. And about not wanting to go on his tummy, there could be something wrong like he is in pain and if your instinct is telling you that he is not physically well then I would go with that. On the other hand, I just think that it pissed my son off when I tried tummy time because he felt trapped in his own body. Also, is he teething? I use teething tablets on my little guy when nothing else seems to work. He has 4 big molars coming in at once right now (his gums are sooooo swollen!). I'm not really sure if they take the pain away, or just take the edge off his bad mood but they help when he's screaming and I'm contemplating calling my dh home from work to take over. :)

    Bookmark   March 27, 2006 at 11:12AM
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col76

Hi Nicv,

Are you still around? as this is a year later, but iam having the same problems with my 8 month old, it has been going on since she was 3 months. Did the problem resolve for you and how?
col76

    Bookmark   June 22, 2007 at 9:36PM
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