I am new to this board and am thankful I found something.
I have been divorced for 9 1/2 years and have an 18 yr old daughter who has had very little contact with me or my parents since the week after thanksgiving.
My ex remarried 6 months after we diroved and then 1 year after that he moved 5 hours away. He rarely came to see my daughter and she would go there about 2x a year. He phone calls were sparatic. My daughter started cutting in 7th grade because of the seperation from her father. I took her to counceling for 2 years. This past summer she decided that she wanted to college in his town and I encouraged her to apply to others, but she wouldn't have that. My parents have a college fund for her. She visited my ex often last summer and met a boy at the college. My parents and I visited the college after thanksgiving and took her with. I questioned whether that was the right choice for her and she became angry and didn't drive back with my parents and I. Her father and my ex MIL drove her back the following day and she stayed with his sister over that weekend. All 3 of his sisters live here. I was called into the school on Monday and was told she wanted to move out and live with her aunt. She then moved to a friend's a house and didn't show for Xmas. She then moved in with her dad after finals were done in January and transfered to the HS up there.
I have written emails often and asked what happened and she cannot give me a clear answer. She claims I was too controlling and overbearing. We had a great relationship and I let her come and go as she pleased because she was a well mannered child and very loving and thoughtful. My parents helped her buy a used car when she was 16. It has been her and I alone all these years. My parents helped us out often and i always made time for her. I did not have a serious relationship with anyone until 2 years ago. I am now engaged (Feb) and he will move in in June. That was planned before she left. She had always intended on leaving in June. I never wanted to take away time from her. She was my parents favorite grandchild and she has crushed them. She will not email back nor call them. I do not have her cell number. The old contract expired at the end of March (which I paid for) and she now has her own. Her father will not give it to me nor will they answer the house phone when they see it's me calling. We did not have good communication the years we have been divorced. She didn't care for him either for leaving her. However, somehow they have brainwashed her.
I don't know what to do. I am so heart broken and can't seem to be happy with my life. I think about her all the time. Should I continue to write her even though I don't get a response? Should I try to block my phone number and demand that I speak to her? I just don't understand how she can be a completely different person than the one I raised. Help. Thanks.