My husband is a couch potato

jillian08November 1, 2008

I wasn't sure how to title this, I don't want to sound glib.

But that's what my husband has become: a couch potato. All he wants to do on weekends and evenings is watch TV. We are in tough financial times right now, so not much money for recreation. But there are things we could do for free, such as work in the yard together, take a walk, go to a museum, etc. He will sit for hours watching and flipping channels.

I did let him know this is making me very unhappy. He used to be quite active, and isn't old (he's in his 40's).

I really don't know what to do. I guess I just needed to vent, and maybe see if anyone else has been through this (or any men reading, if I need to gain some perspective).

Thank you for reading! Have a great weekend.

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phoggie

Oh I can relate very well to this. My DH also is a "recliner" potato....TV has become "first" in his life....he could watch it 24/7/365.....that is the reason I spend so much time on this GW site.

We have 8 TVs in this house....first thing in the morning it goes on in the bathroom, then the bedroom, then the kitchen until he goes to work......comes home then it is the recliner and TV until dinner time and he watches then also....then it is back to the recliner and TV in the LR until he comes to bed and insists on setting the timer for 20 minutes until he falls asleep watching it.....UGH!!!!.

I have severe arthritis and can not even walk outside, or I would spend all my time out there....

I hope you find a solution....you are too young to be so lonely in your marriage.

    Bookmark   November 1, 2008 at 10:11PM
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popi_gw

Do you think he could be depressed ?

How is everything else going in your lives ?

Phoggie - 8 TV's - WOW !.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2008 at 2:16AM
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rivkadr

Personally, I would just start doing stuff without him. Say, "Hey, dear I'm going out to do ______." Maybe throw in a gentle invitation, but don't push it. If you're off having fun, then he may eventually want to start joining you.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2008 at 12:08PM
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jillian08

First, I so appreciate your replies here.

Phoggie, I'm sorry you have arthritis, and can't do what you want, I can imagine how frustrating that is. I'm glad we don't own that many TV's, especially in the bathroom, I'd never get DH out of there! It almost seems like an addiction, doesn't it?

Popi, that's a good question (depressed) and I've asked him if he feels that way. He says no, but I wonder.

Rivkadr, I have recently been doing that, but no luck so far. Maybe like you said, he'll see I'm having fun and want to go.

Thank you all again for your replies!

    Bookmark   November 2, 2008 at 6:03PM
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rivkadr

jillian, it can be hard to get men to admit that they're depressed. If money is tight right now, it may be that your husband is feeling overwhelmed and stressed (and probably depressed) about your financial situation, and his way of coping is to do something that involves absolutely no thought or effort, i.e. TV.

The hard part is getting him to talk about how he may be feeling right now. You don't want to nag him about it -- either the couch potato issue, or your financial difficulties, but you do need to let him know that how he's behaving is impacting you, and that you're worried about him. Have you tried just sitting him down and having a heart to heart with him?

    Bookmark   November 3, 2008 at 9:51PM
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asolo

Or, sometimes, a lazy spouse -- like a lazy child -- just needs a good kick in the ass -- or some other indication that this sluggish behavior is not acceptable. Any adult with a brain -- which I assume your husband has -- would recognize such conduct would not be acceptable.

If you do regard it as acceptable, please disregard above.

    Bookmark   November 3, 2008 at 10:08PM
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