Possible New Beginnings
Well I have posted messages on this site before about the issues in my marriage so I'll keep this brief (try to anyway). Over the last 3 years my marriage has sucked in many ways.......good then bad then good (rollercoaster) ...a lot of bad. Issues from the start of marriage (probs with in laws and husband not wanting to see the negatives in mother or at least not wanting to face them), intimacy issues surfaced after marriage also. The major thing was when he lost his job about 3 years ago because of stupidity. He would have been without a job eventually as the place where he worked did away with all their exisiting management. He was the first to go because of bad choices on his part. He has been such an a**hole. Anyway, all this led to a huge loss of respect for him (by me) and lack of trust,etc. etc. etc. Things just spiraled out of control between us since then. Good jobs weren't happening only crappy ones. The way he went about the job search was maddening at times. I really started to despise him. Our marriage is forever changed...and I mean that. I had always hoped that maybe when he gets that good job-- good would precipitate more good and it would be a visciously good cycle. I wouldn't be so bitter and he would feel better about himself. The marriage will never be what it was, but could we move forward in a new positive direction? Well that time has arrived and now we will see. The good job is finally here. I think I will always have some bitterness at the last 3 years .......I felt, at times, that he ripped out my soul. I am a different person today, stronger, wiser, etc. Any suggestions on how to have a new beginning and let go of past hurts and just move forward in spite of a rocky past? I just want to move forward and not look back anymore. I would appreciate others suggestions or others stories.